I’m not a white haired lady either, and my husband is 20 years older than me. I used to avoid all the dementia events, because I needed something more stimulating for me! Unfortunately, reality has kicked in, and if I don’t go to those events, I end up with no social interaction at all! I still have a problem where my husband would prefer not to see anyone else at all, so I end up cajoling him to come to such events. You may just find some good info when you go to the dementia cafes, and people are kind, and friendly because they need company too. At the same time, some people seem to go to dementia events several times a week, and I couldn't face that either. Please don’t cut yourself off, you may make some friends with good experience who can help you face this awful world you find yourself in. I made a friend at such an event, who is older than me, but her advice is invaluable and she is such a lovely lady, we can chat about all sorts. My husband likes her (we met her while her husband with dementia was still alive) and I have no difficulty getting him to come to meet her.Thank you, your comments and others have really helped me. My therapist suggested I reach out when I told her how guilty I felt about hating my husband some of the time, she said there would be other people out there who felt the same, and she was right. I can't bear to go to dementia cafes because they're full of white-haired ladies who are talking about all the things they do to stimulate their husbands and I'm not a white haired old lady and I can't be the sort of carer they're being.