I need advice

bivvyman

Registered User
Jun 8, 2006
7
Suffolk
Mother is 84 and has Alzheimers for 4 years , She lives on her own with carers going in 3 times per day - She wont let them do a thing as she thinks she is doing everything for herself . She wont change her clothes . She cant handle money , has an imaginery dog and goes and looks for it - Yesterday while she was out looking for the dog, thieves entered and took away her safe . Mother was completely unfazed by the whole experience as she said she couldnt remember having a safe anyway - Ive asked the doctor to check her out as Im concerned she could be self harming , ie not washing , not eating etc . I havent heard anything about the results and it was 2 months ago I contacted the doctor .The Police have classified her as most vulnerable . What can I do to speed things up as she needs to be in a home where she can get the care she needs. When I discuss a carehome with Mother she goes ape as as far as she is concerned theres nothing wrong . Im not looking for any sympathy just straight forward advice .

Regards
 

Kathleen

Registered User
Mar 12, 2005
639
66
West Sussex
Hello and welcome to TP

The first thing I would do is get straight on to the GP again and tell them what is happening, either by phone or letter. Until you have some proffessional input, there is not a lot you can do.

Your Mum is clearly vulnerable, but can't understand that she needs help, not her fault just all part of the illness in a lot of cases.

You might also look into getting an EPA drawn up to make sure her finances are in order.........for example is she paying her bills and collecting her pension etc. Details and downloadable forms can be found on the Public Guardianship Office site.

Sadly, there are people out there who will take advantage of the vulnerable ones in our society and if they have been into her home once, they just might come back..........I don't mean to panic you, but it happens sometimes.

Hopefully others will have some advice for you too.

Kathleen
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
70,710
Kent
I would qualify Kathleen`s advice and make an appointment to visit your mother`s GP, if you can. There`s nothing better than a face to face discussion.
 

Margarita

Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
10,824
london
You must have a crime report , say that to Social services & if they don't put her in a place of safely or organize some technical assistant , your hold them personnel responsible for your mother safely , if anything happen to her in her home in the future
 

Kathleen

Registered User
Mar 12, 2005
639
66
West Sussex
Could the police phone Social Services?

Someone I know was suffering from manic depression and the police had to break into her home on one occasion when she had refused entry to her daughter and the police informed SS which started the ball rolling to get her the help she desperately needed.

Kathleen
 

Margarita

Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
10,824
london
Could the police phone Social Services?
Yes they can , because if they found an elderly person wondering lost in the street , with no ID on them , and the person did not know where they lived , They would have to phone Social services.

If I was you I would Just pop over to police station explaining what happen to your mother and ask them if they could get in contact with Social services , police man said your mother vulnerable person, and you think so also . so when you pop into police station keep repeating she a vulnerable person, tell them your worry, and need help in getting Social services to listen to you , so if they could help you because ......, and show them crime report number



My friend has a disability , I took him to police station , because when he lost his keys the council would not get they Lock smith in to open door , so he could get back in , ( he left keys in flat )

At police station I explain what was happening , that he could not get in , and Council would not help him police phone the council said he was a vulnerable person and the council sent they lock smith out and he did not have to pay
 
Last edited:

nemesisis

Registered User
May 25, 2006
100
have you a cpn you can contact

reading your message is just like looking at my mums condition and the only thing i can say is the cpn is the only person who has helped me.
Social services i have found are useless with alzheimer's all they say is we will get someone to help your mum wash - fine if she is struggling to do it - no good if she says i can manage myself. You need to get back to the cpn who should have been refered to you on diagnosis and explain what is happening
 

Nell

Registered User
Aug 9, 2005
1,170
68
Australia
Margarita said:
You must have a crime report , say that to Social services & if they don't put her in a place of safely or organize some technical assistant , your hold them personnel responsible for your mother safely , if anything happen to her in her home in the future

I think Maggie is absolutely correct, unfortunately! It seems crazy that you have to threaten Social Services in order to achieve basic care interventions, but it seems that is so often the case. In this day and age, threats of litigation seem to work when appeals to common sense and decency fail. What a world we live in!! :(