I hate my life and Alzheimers

[Beannie]

My husband, who has been in Care with early onset Parkinsons and Alzheimers Dementia for 2 and a half years had to go into a Nursing Home in May as his previous Care Home could not cope with him. My 94 year old Mum has mixed Alzheimers and has just come home after a 2 week stay in hospital. As if this wasn't bad enough when I arrived at my husband's Nursing Home this morning to take my husband to his weekly day centre the Home Manager asked to speak to me.

On Sunday my husband took all his clothes off and went into the dining room stark naked. He has also taken carers hostage on 2 occasions this week and barricaded them in his room. If they have one more incident he will have to go into a secure unit.

Iam so scared of this and really hate my life and Alzheimers and cannot see anyway out of this. Does anyone have any similar experience to the above?

Thanks for reading my post.

 

[Sammie234]

I am so sorry how dreadful for you. I have no experience on this for you but I’m sure someone on here will help you if they have experienced the same x

 

[SnowWhite]

Oh Beannie, what a terrible worry for you. All I can do is send you love and hugs. Xx

 

[dancer12]

My husband, who has been in Care with early onset Parkinsons and Alzheimers Dementia for 2 and a half years had to go into a Nursing Home in May as his previous Care Home could not cope with him. My 94 year old Mum has mixed Alzheimers and has just come home after a 2 week stay in hospital. As if this wasn't bad enough when I arrived at my husband's Nursing Home this morning to take my husband to his weekly day centre the Home Manager asked to speak to me.

On Sunday my husband took all his clothes off and went into the dining room stark naked. He has also taken carers hostage on 2 occasions this week and barricaded them in his room. If they have one more incident he will have to go into a secure unit.

Iam so scared of this and really hate my life and Alzheimers and cannot see anyway out of this. Does anyone have any similar experience to the above?

Thanks for reading my post.

Hi Beannie:

Just a quick post, my dad had alzheimers as well, he wasn't safe to himself and to others around him. One day he had a stroke and was admitted to hospital. The hospital couldn't control his aggressiveness toward the nurses and his want to get out. They had to restrain him (for his safety as well as theirs). I went to visit him and it just broke my heart. They later admitted him to secure unit where they could take better care of him ( no restraints and not bound to bed). He was in a secure unit but at least there was no bruises on him or others

It's not easy, alzheimers is not an easy illness. It takes your heart and stomps on it over & over. My husbandhas FTD, the same type my dad had and I dread the day I'll have to visit him in a secure unit .

May GOD bless you & give you the strength to stay strong. Sending you many hugs.

 

[LadyA]

@Beannie I'm sorry to hear of your worries about your husband's situation. You have a lot on your plate, and it must be very difficult to deal with it all. If you would like to talk it over with someone, the team on the Dementia Helpline are very knowledgeable and experienced. They can be contacted at: +03002221122

I too have no direct experience of secure units, but from reading on here, it just means that it's a unit where they have the staff to cope with more challenging behaviour. Also, in a secure unit, doctors are on hand to monitor any tweaks in medication, the aim being always to get the balance right, to give the person with dementia some quality of life.

 

[LizK]

My husband has been in a nursing home for 18 months and has been violent to the staff on many occasions. Some of the carers are small young girls and I feel bad about it. It is now controlled with a sedative before care and Quetiapine an anti psychotic drug. His violence at home was one of the reasons he had to go into full time care. I must say the NH cope with him admirably.
Liz

 

[Casbow]

So sad to read the dreadful things that can happen, caused by dementia. My mum was sectioned and put into the secure dementia unit hospital. She was about 87 years old and when the anger took over she had such strength. She was in the unit for at least 2 months whilst they monitered her and tried tweaking the drugs until they got her stable. Dementia units are different also ,in that the beds are very low to the ground with sensors if they get up. There is nothing that they can get or touch that they can hurt themselves with. Everything was as basic as possible. The staff were specially trained. It was horrible for us her family to see her in there but in the end she became calm and was found a place in a nursing home. There she was very well cared for and spent her last year or so in a calm place with all the help she needed. xx