Hi all, I really need to vent. My dad has alzheimers- he was diagnosed at 63 just after my mum died of cancer. He is now 67, still lives alone and independently and is just about coping, although the house is a pigsty, he keeps breaking everything and he never opens his post.
He lives in Leicestershire, I live in Manchester and my older sister lives in Hertfordshire. We have no other family.
I have just spent in extremely stressful 8 days at my dads, cleaning, organising and supporting him. It's his birthday next week so I asked my sister to invite him to visit her and she phoned him to say I'd asked her to but she was too busy (she's not). I never ever ask her for anything and I don't think she understands the pressure I am under with Dad.
She's not seen him since Christmas, and that was only because I was away so she had to- she's never spent Christmas with him before. Before that she saw him in August. I can get to him about once a month but he needs much more visits than that.
I just feel so alone and I don't know what to do. I don't feel like anyone is helping me and I can't manage him myself, it's too much for me to take. He has friends in the village he lives in but I can't rely on them for ever. I feel awful for being so self obsessed- he's got it far worse than me, I'm the kind of person who just gets on with it and never complains. My sisters refusal to help has just devastated me.
I don't know what I am asking for from this post or even why I am posting it. Sorry to moan.
Victoria
He lives in Leicestershire, I live in Manchester and my older sister lives in Hertfordshire. We have no other family.
I have just spent in extremely stressful 8 days at my dads, cleaning, organising and supporting him. It's his birthday next week so I asked my sister to invite him to visit her and she phoned him to say I'd asked her to but she was too busy (she's not). I never ever ask her for anything and I don't think she understands the pressure I am under with Dad.
She's not seen him since Christmas, and that was only because I was away so she had to- she's never spent Christmas with him before. Before that she saw him in August. I can get to him about once a month but he needs much more visits than that.
I just feel so alone and I don't know what to do. I don't feel like anyone is helping me and I can't manage him myself, it's too much for me to take. He has friends in the village he lives in but I can't rely on them for ever. I feel awful for being so self obsessed- he's got it far worse than me, I'm the kind of person who just gets on with it and never complains. My sisters refusal to help has just devastated me.
I don't know what I am asking for from this post or even why I am posting it. Sorry to moan.
Victoria