I feel bad now!

Linda Mc

Registered User
Jul 3, 2005
1,881
Nr Mold
Just had a delivery of fresh fish to pack for freezer and asked Vic to open some more freezer bags for me. He couldn't manage it and I snapped at him and now I feel so awful! He looked so bewildered. Why, oh why did I lose patience over something so petty?:(

He has gone off with his Crossroads lady for the afternoon and hopefully he will forget about it.

Meanwhile I'll finish the packing for going away tomorrow.

Linda x
 

Tender Face

Account Closed
Mar 14, 2006
5,379
NW England
Oh Linda! My every sympathy. I have to confess to 'losing it' recently with mum over changing her bed (and several other mostly petty things over the last few months). Of course, she wants to 'help' - but 'helping' acquires an entirely new definition!!!! :rolleyes: Last week when I realised she had lost the art of even stuffing a pillowcase I just resolved to make sure I get the laundry changed when she is out at Daycare and I don't have to actually refuse her offers of 'help' - or risk getting frustrated with her when she does.

That probably puts me in trouble for failing to promote her independence and skills! :(

I think part of it too, is our way of expressing the sadness that we are witnessing their loss of such simple skills, never mind the pressure of jobs to be done and the sooner done the better .......

Hugs, Karen, x
 

Margarita

Registered User
Feb 17, 2006
10,824
london
No how you feel , what I say to myself when I get stress with coping with everything on my own with my mother would get right snappy , don't be so hard on yourself margaret give yourself a break from beating yourself up about it , took deep breath carry on .

and the build up of packing going on holiday can also be very stress full can make you snappy, its normal . I know I did not have the patience of a saint when mum tried to help in the past in the kitchen as time went on I just learn not to ask her anymore as if I was not patience with her........ duck because she get very angry things could go flying :D
 
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Norman

Registered User
Oct 9, 2003
4,348
Birmingham Hades
Hi Linda
it all about frustration.
You are not really shouting at them.
You are shouting at the world,the disease the whole situation.
You shout at them not because they cannot perform the simple tasks but because you so badly wnat them too.
Don't blame yourself, Mum will forget.
Hope this makes sense.
Norman
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
70,638
Kent
It`s such a learning curve Linda, and you can`t be expected to be Mrs. Patience 24/7, especially when you have 101 other things to do, preparing for your holiday.

I think this is when you realize how much the onus is on you, and only you, to get things done.

I`m sure Vic will have forgotten all about it by the time he comes home, and if you give him an extra big hug and kiss, he`ll think it`s his birthday. :)

Enjoy your holiday.

Love xx
 

Skye

Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
17,000
SW Scotland
Norman said:
Hi Linda
it all about frustration.
You are not really shouting at them.
You are shouting at the world,the disease the whole situation.
You shout at them not because they cannot perform the simple tasks but because you so badly wnat them too.
Don't blame yourself, Mum will forget.
Hope this makes sense.
Norman
Norman, what a helpful reply. I don't think any of us would claim never to have shouted (unless we some saints among us), and the guilt afterward is awful. But you're right, it's anger at seeing yet another skill gone, just another los of ability.

Linda, don't feel guilty, it happens to all of us. And have a great holiday.

Love,
 

Cate

Registered User
Jul 2, 2006
1,370
Newport, Gwent
Linda dont feel guilty, just think about it, if Vic had annoyed you pre AD you would have said something............. mum and I used to have our spats before she was ill, and I didnt turn into St Cate after!!! Just much grinding of teeth:eek:

Enjoy the hols.

Love
Cate