Dad is self funding and they will do a fortnight .They are assessing him but if he wants to stay longer that wouldn’t be a problem.14 days is the shortest they do.@maryjoan, I am very sorry to hear this, but at the same time am most grateful to read this thread tonight, as my sister feels exactly as you do and is just starting what we all fear may be a protracted fight with Adult Services to convince them - even after needs assessment - that her OH needs 24/7 care but has no comprehension of how bad he is or the effect it is having on her emotional health especially. He is adamant that he wants to continue with care in his own home, of course, and the SW has decided his preference must be respected because - in her judgement - he has capacity. She has made similar comments to the ones @kindred got from their SW.
Although my sister's OH is a self-funder at the moment, we've confirmed that because he is so close to the 23k threshold, no private care home will take him on without prior financial agreement with the SS to take over funding. Meanwhile, because he self-funding, the SW has closed the case for now. We're in a bind.
I too wasn't aware of the possibility to arrange 4-week respite for the purposes of assessment (privately or otherwise). This could be a lifeline. From what TNJJ says, a shorter period might also be possible. Are private homes generally happy to undertake this for the purposes of assessment, though? Availability of beds for respite seems very low in my sister's area, so it may be Hobson's choice as to where this would take place.
From what I can gather, to get SS co-operation, everything hinges on mental capacity. Is that included in the respite assessment? And then after that, there's DoLS. Hoops, hurdles, traps and brick walls in every direction - anything to delay SS involvement and save money. I understand they are under enormous pressure too, but it's so depressing when it's as clear as day to everyone that residential care is genuinely in the best interests of the PWD and their carer at this point.