I don't seem to say the right words!

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by Coffee time, Nov 25, 2015.

  1. Coffee time

    Coffee time Registered User

    Oct 27, 2015
    9
    Dad is now in a wonderful home, but because he's not in the house, Mum is visiting him and thinks that he doesn't remember her. She keeps saying that she never dreamt it would end like this, and although she's in an excellent facility and has her own flat, she "looks empty".
    I try and persuade her to join in with some the activities but it doesn't really get me anywhere, she can't see well and I've suggested that as well as her taxi ride to Dad on a Tuesday - she could join one of the clubs......Boom - not a hope!...(can't see/he always used to be there/don't know why it happened to him/I should be looking after him etc etc)
    It's early on in her journey and to her it's a mix between coping and surviving.
    I want to help and get her somebody to share her grief with, but she won't talk to anyone else (private person from the previous time of never discussing feelings).
    She needs company, but won't go out and meet anyone.
    I feel so sad but my sadness is nothing compared to hers. I survive cos I'm the daughter, she's the wife and I worry that I'm not doing enough. A marriage of 63 years and it ends like this. I do remind her of the good times btw, yep that's a hollow note as well!
    One day I'm gonna put something good on here, that's my New Years resolution!!:eek::eek:
     
  2. Cat27

    Cat27 Volunteer Moderator

    Feb 27, 2015
    10,346
    Merseyside
    Sometimes there are no right words. We just have to muddle through & do our best.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.