Thank you for the good wishes everyone, I felt the power and love of TP behind me today.
It all went surprisingly smoothly. I went in this morning and the handyman came and carried the case in, and put up the pictures and photos. The male charge nurse welcomed me to the unit, and carers and nurses kept popping in to introduce themselves.
This afternoon I went to the hospital for 1.30, found somewhere to park (always a problem), and went up to the ward, to be told that John had just left. Back down in the lift to see the ambulance just pulling away! Raced back to the car and belted back to the NH, just as they were taking John out of the ambulance, so I was able to be with him when he went to his room.
It's lovely, ground floor, south facing, very sunny, and overlooking the garden. Again, everyone kept popping in to say hello. The hairdresser was in, so he's had his hair washed and trimmed -- much needed after a month of bed baths!
I'm very impressed with the file they keep on everyone, with umpteen different care plans. We only filled in the essentials today, they do it a bit at a time as they get to know people.
I came away as they sat down to tea, but son has been in this evening, and reported that John was sound asleep and snoring loudly. It's been an eventful day!
And he loved his squirrel!
Love and many, many thanks for all the good wishes.
So pleased it went well, Hazel. Sometimes the things we fear aren't as bad in reality. Although there will be ups and downs, as there are whatever the circumstances with someone with this illness, I'm sure you will find that overall you will be able to enjoy a better quality of relationship together now that the day to day burden of care is removed. Sleep well!
I just scanned most of this thread, and I thikn you have been marvellous coping as long as you have, and now having the strength to make the right choices for John and yourslef. I hope you put your feet up for a few hours. Take care and best wishes to you both.
I'm so glad it went so well (told you so, didn't I?) You'll probably find yourself completely exhausted for a few days at some point soon - that's just stress catching up to you. Just make sure you take care of youself - rest, rest and more rest.
Thanks for the messages. I'm still very sad that it has come to this, but relieved on so many fronts.
Firstly, that John is in such a lovely place, with such caring staff. He appears to have settled very well. He's still having spells of agitation, but he was having them in hospital, I think they're still the after-effects of the infection. It was a lovely day again today, and we sat for a while in the garden. I'm going to post some pics.
Secondly, it's a great relief that John is being properly cared for, and I don't have to worry about him falling. He was weighed today 13 1/2 stone! No wonder I couldn't lift him!
Thirdly, I'm thankful that my step-sons are supporting me, and know I couldn't cope any longer.
Fourthly, I grateful to my wonderful financial advisor. I rang him yesterday afternoon and told him I needed another £500 a month. This afternoon he called in on his way home from work with three forms for me to sign. I know not everyone on this site believes in using them, but for me he has been worth his weight in gold.
Fifthly, I'm so grateful for all the support I've received from my friends on TP. It would have been so much harder without you.
So yes, it was an awful decision to make, but I've been so lucky to have had so much support.