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I can’t believe this is happening

Lynmax

Registered User
Nov 1, 2016
591
Just me, it must have been such a shock to you to get that phone call out of the blue.

I'm very grateful that I had this conversation with my mums new GP when she was admitted to a care home in April. The GP had visited mum at the home even though at that stage in the lockdown very few doctors were doing face to face visits but she felt it was important to meet mum. The doctor was very kind and caring, taking the time to explain things very carefully so that I understood how the care home and her doctor would look after her should her health decline and we agreed that a hospital visit would be a last resort. This doctor even took the trouble to speak to mums oncology consultant about ongoing treatment.

I wish all doctors were like that, at least now I won't get an upsetting phone call from a stranger.
 

Just me

Registered User
Nov 17, 2013
494
Thanks for all your replies and support it really does help.

I do understand the implications of resuscitation, it was just a shock to get the phone call late at night 11 days after she had tested positive and she was doing so well.
That morning I had been told she was well, moving around, chatting, eating and drinking, chest clear and no temperature.
Mum finished her career as a Ward Sister and I know she wouldn’t want to go through the trauma of being resuscitated especially as a positive outcome can’t be guaranteed.

I’m having such difficulty getting through to the hospital but last night the assessment ward she was previously on rang and said mum was now on AMU, was settled, had bloods taken and they’d take them again this morning and make a decision whether to ward her or return her to the assessment ward.
Looking positive I thought.

Today I’ve spent all morning trying to get through to AMU for an update and eventually enlisted PALS help which worked as I had a phone call from AMU.

They told me mums being treated for Covid pneumonia, has had meds to calm her and is on one to one care. She’s refusing food and drink and refusing to swallow. She’s on IV fluids, steroids and antibiotics and oxygen and had a nebuliser as she is short of breath.

The last time I was allowed to see her was three weeks ago and I had to raise concerns with the ward.

It seems mums making her own decision about what happens and I don’t blame her, she’s had an awful time since I called the crisis team in 10/10/20 but I’m being selfish and I want her to get better so I can give her a cuddle.

I started this in floods of tears but they’ve stopped for now so sharing does help x
 

Izzy

Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
63,241
69
Dundee
I’m so sorry to read your update @Just me. I’m glad you’ve shared here and it has helped a bit. Thinking of you and wishing you strength.
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
2,975
South East
I don’t think it’s selfish at all to want a cuddle and to want her better . I too am sending strength and hugs 🤗❤. Thinking of you both . X
 

Just me

Registered User
Nov 17, 2013
494
Thank you @Woo2. I was told Friday there was slight improvement in the lungs but she has a significant infection and Doctor didn’t know which way it would go and was reviewing it (? continue treatment) over the weekend x
 

Just me

Registered User
Nov 17, 2013
494
I didn’t word that very well @Woo2, it’s so hard to say. The review was to see if they should stop treatment.
I was told it was a small infection earlier in the week then on Friday was told it was significant and that mum was quite unwell. When she said there was a slight clearing in the lungs I latched onto that and it’s held me together this weekend.
I’ve been trying to get through to the ward for 6 hours today and it’s either engaged or it rings 40 times and then says call failed.
I’m not so good, being alone, waiting for the phone to ring then not being able to get through is ....
The doctor did say they’d let me know if they decided to stop treatment so I’m thinking no news is good news 🤗
 

Shedrech

Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
9,435
Yorkshire
thinking of you both @Just me
are you able to contact the hospital PALS as they may be able to liaise for you and find a way to get more contact and information
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
2,975
South East
I agree that no need is good news , I’m sorry you are having such a hard time getting any information . I too would go via Pals , if I remember correctly so done else here did just that and got a call later that day , not sure who it was . Sending more hugs 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 Take care of yourself , it sounds so flippant but it’s easy to neglect yourself .
 

Just me

Registered User
Nov 17, 2013
494
Thank you @Shedrech and @Woo2,
I’d decided to stop trying for the night snd if I get no joy tomorrow to ring PALS to assist, I thought about it too late today.
It was me @Woo2 who got PALS involved the other day ☺
 

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