I am exhausted
- Thread starter Helen33
- Start date
Helen
I am glad you are feeling a bit better, I took Brian to florida and although the family were with us I found it very hard work and draining, I also realised that it was probably the last holiday I will be able to take him on, so probably last hol for me for quite a while to. I can understand you feeling you need a break and I hope you manage to organise something
Love
Lorraine
I am glad you are feeling a bit better, I took Brian to florida and although the family were with us I found it very hard work and draining, I also realised that it was probably the last holiday I will be able to take him on, so probably last hol for me for quite a while to. I can understand you feeling you need a break and I hope you manage to organise something
Love
Lorraine
Hello Maggie
Definitely. I would love it as long as he could stay at home with someone he knows and is happy with. I would not want him to be placed somewhere that would cause him any distress. It is evident from the pictures how happy he has become since the sitting service and the therapeutic effects of the 100% attention they can give him and also the narrowboat holiday and I would not want this being ruined by him being placed in a situation that would cause him to lose this. He doesn't like a lot of people or noise and so home is the best place for him.
Love
Definitely. I would love it as long as he could stay at home with someone he knows and is happy with. I would not want him to be placed somewhere that would cause him any distress. It is evident from the pictures how happy he has become since the sitting service and the therapeutic effects of the 100% attention they can give him and also the narrowboat holiday and I would not want this being ruined by him being placed in a situation that would cause him to lose this. He doesn't like a lot of people or noise and so home is the best place for him.
Love
Dear Helen,
Going on holiday and leaving the one you love at home is very bitter sweet. I brooded quite a lot whilst on my recent holiday and found that I was useless at talking the 'small talk'. I used to be such an outgoing and sociable person. I have changed so much. Nothing is ever the same.
You put me to shame with the gardening! Well done you. I haven't the energy or time for my poor garden nowadays.
xxTinaT
Going on holiday and leaving the one you love at home is very bitter sweet. I brooded quite a lot whilst on my recent holiday and found that I was useless at talking the 'small talk'. I used to be such an outgoing and sociable person. I have changed so much. Nothing is ever the same.
You put me to shame with the gardening! Well done you. I haven't the energy or time for my poor garden nowadays.
xxTinaT
Hello Helen: I hope you are feeling better. If you can manage 'in home' care then it would be good for you to get away for a short break.
Tina: I understand so much about the small talk. I have just been out for a supper followed by a talk. I was with friends but felt intolerant of the chit chat!!
Its good to know I am not the only one.
For you both some flowers:
Love Jan
Tina: I understand so much about the small talk. I have just been out for a supper followed by a talk. I was with friends but felt intolerant of the chit chat!!
Its good to know I am not the only one.
For you both some flowers:
Love Jan
Attachments
Yes it is, but I understand all to much, how draining it can became on you, because in the early years so did my mother I even took mum abroad with me she was fine, having my attention seem to have such a positive effect on mum
but in the long team into our future it got so exhausting on me .
I now what you mean, you don't want to rock the boat, but that boat going to be rock one day .
but if you can find a way around it to not happen sooner. If be great so positive for him, if you could get your husband to have respite in his own home.
Could you not find out about getting direct payments like Gigi thinking of doing ?
So you can get someone to live in , while you get a few days or a week away ?
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Thank you so much for the flowers. They look so lovely and I can almost smell the sweet, rose perfume! Gigi you will have to post a picture of all the lovely flowers which come up after all the hard gardening you have done.
xxTinaT
xxTinaT
....
Whoa there...Tina...I think you mean Helen...she's the one putting us all to shame..
Sylvia...you send such lovely flowers...
Love gigi xx
Gigi:
Posting at 5.35 am!!! You WILL BE exhausted
I hope you are ok and not too troubled to be up so early.
Love Jan
Posting at 5.35 am!!! You WILL BE exhausted
I hope you are ok and not too troubled to be up so early.
Love Jan
Exhausted...moi?
Thanks for the concern, Jan...
No-one tells you at the start of the journey that not only will you need to develop broad shoulders...the stamina of a lion and the patience of a saint...
You'll also have to manoeuvre your way through unpredictable sleeping patterns...
And when your husband wants to get up and drink tea at 4 0'clock in the morning...that's what you do...
My powers of persuasion are slipping...no way was he going back to bed..4 o'clock in the morning meant nothing to him..
It's a case of.."I'm awake..therefore I get up and drink tea!"
Love gigi xx
Thanks for the concern, Jan...
No-one tells you at the start of the journey that not only will you need to develop broad shoulders...the stamina of a lion and the patience of a saint...
You'll also have to manoeuvre your way through unpredictable sleeping patterns...
And when your husband wants to get up and drink tea at 4 0'clock in the morning...that's what you do...
My powers of persuasion are slipping...no way was he going back to bed..4 o'clock in the morning meant nothing to him..
It's a case of.."I'm awake..therefore I get up and drink tea!"
Love gigi xx
Love And Hugs To You All Xxx
I just wanted to send you all awee message to let you know I am thinknig of you (and ashamed of myself as I feel sorry for me today Thyriod playing up again) You are all lovely and here is a wee piccy for you all xxx ( and a kick on the bum for me )
I just wanted to send you all awee message to let you know I am thinknig of you (and ashamed of myself as I feel sorry for me today Thyriod playing up again
) You are all lovely and here is a wee piccy for you all xxx ( and a kick on the bum for me )Attachments
![16910584a4940685265l[1].gif](/data/attachments/3/3400-3b0e113ef2da3ea22c4321e8f4ed9cba.jpg)
Thank you all so much especially for the flowers
I have decided (well 99% of me) to ask the SW to come who gave me such a large sitting service package I would like to ask what the possibilities are of having 1 weekend every 3 months. What do you think. I do want Alan to stay at home and will not even contemplate him going into residential respite because I want him to stay as he is for as long as possible.
Love
I have decided (well 99% of me) to ask the SW to come who gave me such a large sitting service package
I would like to ask what the possibilities are of having 1 weekend every 3 months. What do you think. I do want Alan to stay at home and will not even contemplate him going into residential respite because I want him to stay as he is for as long as possible.Love
Dear Sam
I am sorry that you are not feeling too well today Sam and the last thing you need is a kick up the bum so I will share my flowers with youView attachment 4537
I hope you feel better soon.
Love
I am sorry that you are not feeling too well today Sam and the last thing you need is a kick up the bum so I will share my flowers with you
View attachment 4537I hope you feel better soon.
Love
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What a lovely phrase!!! It applies to you all and may we have the strength to keep it up.
Helen: If you were in the High Peak there would not be a 'cat in hell'chance of weekend respite! But I was envious of you last time so lets up you can pull it off again.
There are agencies who do this sort of thing. Way back a tp member pmed me about one - I will try to find details IF you need them.
I plan to be pruning roses but watching tennis at the same time as TP.
Love Jan
holiday
hi helen
i've just scan read most of these posts to get to the end so i can reply, which i think will still be relevant.
firstly, the photos of alan do not tell the whole story. i admit that when i saw them, i thought how very much 'there' he seemed in his eyes, so could be tempted to think as others have suggested he can not be end stages. but i know how confusing it can be with 'stages'. when i read the 7 stage system a few months ago, steve was very obviously at stage 5 and on paper, more like stage 6 according to the definition. but if i told anyone this they would think i was mad. he still has his personality (contrary to his type of dementia), and it's purely practical things he can't do, ie, anything. but it's annoying when i want to pigeonhole him and the stage he's at (for my benefit) and it doesn't seem to match up with the whole picture from any text i read. i spoke to someone at the alzheimer's cafe a week ago who was told 5yrs re her hubby when diagnosed (age 55, also ftd) and he's only just gone in a home 20yrs later!
secondly, i had a 24hr break with the help of friends last weekend and enjoyed being off duty, so if you can, do it. even if only a short thing. it may be harder to settle back into routine if longer anyway and make you depressed (i thought that about myself when re-adjusting after only 24hrs).
hi helen
i've just scan read most of these posts to get to the end so i can reply, which i think will still be relevant.
firstly, the photos of alan do not tell the whole story. i admit that when i saw them, i thought how very much 'there' he seemed in his eyes, so could be tempted to think as others have suggested he can not be end stages. but i know how confusing it can be with 'stages'. when i read the 7 stage system a few months ago, steve was very obviously at stage 5 and on paper, more like stage 6 according to the definition. but if i told anyone this they would think i was mad. he still has his personality (contrary to his type of dementia), and it's purely practical things he can't do, ie, anything. but it's annoying when i want to pigeonhole him and the stage he's at (for my benefit) and it doesn't seem to match up with the whole picture from any text i read. i spoke to someone at the alzheimer's cafe a week ago who was told 5yrs re her hubby when diagnosed (age 55, also ftd) and he's only just gone in a home 20yrs later!
secondly, i had a 24hr break with the help of friends last weekend and enjoyed being off duty, so if you can, do it. even if only a short thing. it may be harder to settle back into routine if longer anyway and make you depressed (i thought that about myself when re-adjusting after only 24hrs).
