1. Expert Q&A: Benefits - Weds 23 October, 3-4pm

    Our next expert Q&A will be on the topic of benefits. It will be hosted by Lauren from our Knowledge Services team. She'll be answering your questions on Wednesday 23 October between 3-4pm.

    You can either post your question >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll be happy to ask them on your behalf.

I am a new member to Talking Point

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by ourkid, Aug 30, 2015.

  1. ourkid

    ourkid Registered User

    Aug 30, 2015
    I am a new member to talking point, I am 83 yrs old and my wife was diagnosed with Alzheimers 4 years ago, we have been married 63 yrs this year and I am finding it very hard at this present time. I am glad I have found your site and I hope it can help me not to feel so isolated
  2. Sue J

    Sue J Registered User

    Dec 9, 2009
    Welcome to TP ourkid I am sorry you are finding things hard right now. You will find support and understanding here which will help you feel less isolated.

    Best wishes
  3. Kevinl

    Kevinl Registered User

    Aug 24, 2013
    Hi Ourkid, welcome to TP
    Just throw anything you have to say in the ring and we'll share our thoughts on it with you after all we're al in the same boat.
  4. Chuggalug

    Chuggalug Registered User

    Mar 24, 2014
    Ourkid; I can only offer a big welcome, as everyone else has. Never be afraid to pop on and say your piece, whatever it may be. We've all been through the mill regarding this, and all at different ages and states of health.

    Here's hoping you'll find Talking Point a big help and benefit to you and your loved one.
  5. stanleypj

    stanleypj Registered User

    Dec 8, 2011
    North West
    I know you will find TP invaluable Ourkid. It is a hard road but do post about the things that are making your life particularly hard. You will certainly find other people will have ideas that might help.
  6. Casbow

    Casbow Registered User

    Sep 3, 2013

    Welcome to Talking point. I find it invaluable especially the first time I wrote about how upset I was feeling. So many people gave me encouragement and support. It just made me feel less alone. If you have anything that you feel you need advice about (how to deal with things) there will always be someone to try and help you. Good luck. x
  7. stanleypj

    stanleypj Registered User

    Dec 8, 2011
    North West
    Duplicate post deleted.
  8. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    Welcome to TP Ourkid, glad you've found us, keep posting.

    Sent from my iPad using Talking Point
  9. annolly

    annolly Registered User

    Jun 1, 2015
    I am a newby too..

    Hi there,
    Im a newby too.Both to Talking Point,and to having a husband with Dementia,recently diagnosed .He is 82,and I`m his wife/carer/cook /youname it ....
    I dont resent any of it,but oh,I DO feel so alone....
    I have started looking round for what help is available for him/us.There was someone who would come and sit with him....for £15 an hour!! I did ask ,if he would be gardening or decorating whilst he was here,at that price !! lol
    Im turning into an angry,confrontational person,and I dont like it.. : (
    Sorry to moan,but theres no one I can tell.....
    Life gets tedious,dont it ?????
  10. Chuggalug

    Chuggalug Registered User

    Mar 24, 2014
    I've also been that angry, confrontational person. Then, it wasn't long before I "knew" I wasn't worth the effort, and it showed in almost every conversation I had. I am worth the effort, annolly - and so are you. Get all the advice you need for whatever you need. Ask, ask and ask again. And, after asking and getting responses, take the advice you are given and make it work for the good of both of you.

    Much love to you.
  11. truth24

    truth24 Registered User

    Oct 13, 2013
    North Somerset
    Welcome both you newcomers. Hopefully you will find the support, advice and comfort that are offered here. Don't think there's a problem someone here will have not experienced and none of us stand in judgment of any feelings you might have. We are all experiencing or have experienced everything that you are going through and and can hopefully lend a listening ear when needed. Best wishes
  12. CollegeGirl

    CollegeGirl Registered User

    Jan 19, 2011
    North East England
    Welcome from me too - I love the name you've chosen, ourkid! I hope - I know - you'll get lots of friendly advice and support here. It really can be a lifeline. Ask away, and remember that nothing, absolutely nothing, is too trivial or bizarre to ask. If you need an answer to something, there is almost always someone around to help you out.
  13. Kevinl

    Kevinl Registered User

    Aug 24, 2013
    Hi Annolly, welcome to TP
    It can't be easy at your age to cope with this, I'm only 59 and looking after my wife 24 hours a day, 7 days a week is hard work. In a way because we're both relatively young and she's pretty much fully mobile we can still do a lot of things which keep her occupied and keep me sane, we go out everyday even if it's just to the supermarket or for a walk by the canal. As you say you can get help at a price but there may be things available in your area (more likely in a town than rural) so do a search in google for your specific area and something may turn up, Admiral nurses, local AZ club, café singing group or whatever.
    It's fair enough to be angry about the hand life has dealt you but it's not good going down that road it's "the road to nowhere" that's from someone who's been doing it for a few years now and previously having looked after my mum with AZ.
    "Life get's tedious don't it" is that from the song? It can but it doesn't have to, I think finding someone local in the same position or a group you can join, failing that just tell us, I've just checked the home page and there's 535 of us out here listening at 10pm on a Sunday night.
  14. Dazmum

    Dazmum Registered User

    A warm welcome to you both, sorry you've had to find us, but this is such a great site to ask questions, have a rant and always be understood and helped, or just to feel that you aren't alone xxx
  15. Tiller Girl

    Tiller Girl Registered User

    May 14, 2012
    Hello and welcome to both of you !

    I'm sure you'll both find something of interest on the site.
  16. JayGun

    JayGun Registered User

    Jun 24, 2013
    All right Ourkid and welcome. The same to you Annolly. *waves*

    Care is £15 for 15 minutes round our way. It's a horror.
  17. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    A very warm welcome to both newcomers. :) On Talking Point you will find a friendly group of people, who understand your problems. Nobody judges anyone else, and whatever your problem, you'll find that others can offer advice and/or support.

    I have always found it far easier to off-load my worries on here, amongst a huge circle of cyber friends, than in Real Life.

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