My husband with Lewy Bodies dementia (diagnosed some 4 years ago) has been offered a place next week in a local care home where he used to go for day care for two days per week before lockdown. I am so tired of coping alone with all the delusions, disturbed nights, recently double incontinence, mountains of washing, taking him out to something interesting every day and doing everything (which many of you will be all too familiar with!) Recently I His mobility is now affected and he no longer goes for a walk with the result that I cannot leave him and so get no exercise either although I a m fortunately still fit and active. though now have to wear a wig as my hair is dropping out with the stress of it all.
have told the Social Worker that I am just worn out (we have no family nearby to help) and that I really cannot cope any more. Last week Social Services brought in a carer in the morning to get my husband dressed etc. which is a help and two mornings a carer takes him out for 3 hours. which allows me to do housework (since with lockdown I now cannot use the time to see friends which was a much better use of the time)
I am torn between the fact that in the home he will not be allowed visitors and cannot go out and about every day and the effect that it will have on him and the fact that I am worn out and cannot keep on. Friends who have put their partners into care have said 'Don't leave it too late!' as their health has suffered greatly by hanging on trying to do their best at their own expense.
What do members think is the best thing to do given the lockdown arrangements and the fact that lack of visitors may continue for some time if he goes into the Care Home. I do appreciate all your advice and thoughts on this.
have told the Social Worker that I am just worn out (we have no family nearby to help) and that I really cannot cope any more. Last week Social Services brought in a carer in the morning to get my husband dressed etc. which is a help and two mornings a carer takes him out for 3 hours. which allows me to do housework (since with lockdown I now cannot use the time to see friends which was a much better use of the time)
I am torn between the fact that in the home he will not be allowed visitors and cannot go out and about every day and the effect that it will have on him and the fact that I am worn out and cannot keep on. Friends who have put their partners into care have said 'Don't leave it too late!' as their health has suffered greatly by hanging on trying to do their best at their own expense.
What do members think is the best thing to do given the lockdown arrangements and the fact that lack of visitors may continue for some time if he goes into the Care Home. I do appreciate all your advice and thoughts on this.