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Hubby dying


Registered User
Nov 11, 2010
north Wales
Well it's been 8 long years since hubby had his stroke and 4 years since the VasD diagnosis.
Started about 4 weeks ago when he had a recurrence of gallstone trouble then the day after a urine infection. He more or less stopped drinking after that and has stopped eating this last 8/9 days although his drinking did pick up for a couple of days.
GP was called out or phoned nearly every day last week until Thursday when the Doc gave me the option of have blood tests done to rule out and physical cause.
Bloods came back normal, Doc was looking for low sodium/magnesium/potassium.
So when he phoned Friday with results I asked him time scales.
Not eating approx. 2 months, not drinking or eating approx. 2 weeks.
Hubby is really not good, just lying there, rarely speaks but still manages a lovely smile sometimes- I said 'That's a lovely smile' and he said 'it's only for you' so hubby is still there somewhere.
I have finally had to ask the local hospice for some help as hubby cannot stand and I am struggling changing his pads but, of course, there is no-one there as it's a bank holiday. Just hope I can somehow change him the next 2 days. Although he has lost 3 stone he is still 16 stone.
Anyway I would just like to thank everyone on the forum including all the people that run it. Without this forum I would still have been in the dark as it has taught me so much and been an invaluable help over the years
Take care of yourselves


Registered User
Sep 23, 2008
I do not know what to say except I have tears in my eyes reading your post. My thoughts are with you and your husband.
Do you have any contact with the district nursing team? I only ask because we had help from a lovely district nurse recently over the Easter Bank holiday and they are around on weekends and public holidays.
My thoughts are with you.


Registered User
Nov 28, 2005
I am sorry to hear such sad news and hope that everything possible is being done to keep your husband comfortable and peaceful. In turn that will help you face this difficult time.

As and when you feel up to it please keep in touch and let us know how things are going for you. Try to take care of yourself too.


Registered User
Jan 14, 2010
East Kent
Thinking of you
I don't know if Social services have an out of hours service where you are, a lot of areas do


Volunteer Moderator
Aug 31, 2003
Anne I'm so sorry to read your sad news. Thinking of you and wishing you strength. x
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Registered User
Aug 30, 2012
Brixham Devon
Anne. I'm sorry that you are posting with such sad news. I hope you are coping as well as you possibly can. I tried looking for the number of SS's in N Wales, but without knowing what Town you are near it was impossible, Could you phone 111 and perhaps get some help that way? In the meantime I hope that you find the strength needed and your Husband is peaceful.

Thinking of you

Lyn T XX

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
I`m so sorry to hear your news Anne. We know it will happen but it doesn`t make it any easier.

I do hope you can get some help.


Registered User
Oct 3, 2011
Sorry to learn of your present situation but happy that 'hubby is still there somewhere' - one of those moments to treasure. I hope you get some help soon in the interests of both of you.


Registered User
May 10, 2010
Very sad for you, a most difficult and heart breaking time.

Lovely that he said those loving words to you - somewhere deep within they are there.

When you feel like it do let us know how he is, and how you are. Wishing you continued strength.

My thoughts are with you

Loo xx


Registered User
Dec 8, 2011
North West
Such a sad time for you. I do hope you are able to get some help. These crises take no notice of weekends or Bank Holidays and there should be help available. I hope you are able to find it.


Registered User
Mar 26, 2011
Near Southampton
I feel such sadness for you. Yes, it is a Bank holiday but for family carers there is no such thing. What beautiful words your husband spoke to you. Something to treasure for a long time to come. Sending you a hug and masses of sympathy. xxx

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