How to get my Mum out of hospital

SydK2021

New member
Dec 10, 2021
5
0
My Mum 92 today went into hospital 10 days ago with a heart problem but while there is being assessed for dementia. I live 200 miles away and with Covid regulations in Wales as they are it is difficult for her to have visitors. My brother visited today and was shocked by her decline since she has gone into hospital. The medical staff are still saying that they are awaiting further assessments but there is no time scale given to assessment and then to providing a care package moving forward. We are extremely concerned that being in a hospital environment is doing her much more harm than good, does anyone have any advice of how we go about pushing the hospital/ social services to at least meet with the family. Tough times so any adevice will be much appreciated. Ak
 

melli

Registered User
Dec 9, 2021
41
0
I’m so sorry you are going through this, it’s so hard to get answers and COVID just makes everything so much harder. I went through this with Mom this year and I couldn’t get anywhere with Social services and they wanted to just send my Mom home with no package and a wait and see attitude. Does your Mom live alone ? Or have any care packages in place?
I ended up paying for Mom to go into respite in a nursing home I chose as they wanted to send her miles away, then it took me months to get an assessment and appointment with SS. However she was safe and had support of nursing staff and good contact with GP.
 

Scarlet Lady

Registered User
Apr 6, 2021
573
0
Hi, @AlanKearle and welcome to TP. Hopefully, you’ll find lots of advice going forward.
I'm sure lots of us recognise the situation you’re in. People with dementia generally speaking don’t cope well in hospital, although I appreciate that your mum hasn’t got a diagnosis yet. There’s not a lot of joined-up thinking going on at hospitals at the moment, so if they’re concentrating on her heart issues, maybe the mental issues will take a bit of a back seat.
However, whatever happens, you can be assured that they will want to discharge her ASAP into a care facility (usually a care home) so if everyone is agreed she isn’t ready to go home, somewhere else will have to be found. They may well suggest you arrange this, at little notice. Do not agree to this. It is not your job. The hospital social worker needs to take over and find suitable care. This should be what is termed assessment/reablement care in a suitable facility, within the person’s local authority. The LA will provide COVID Funding for the first four weeks of care, after which there should be a best interests meeting with the family and all other interested parties to see how best to go forward. The hospital social worker is the best person to get the ball rolling. Not the best time of year to be doing this, but just one of those things. Good luck, hope it gets sorted soon.
 

SydK2021

New member
Dec 10, 2021
5
0
T
I’m so sorry you are going through this, it’s so hard to get answers and COVID just makes everything so much harder. I went through this with Mom this year and I couldn’t get anywhere with Social services and they wanted to just send my Mom home with no package and a wait and see attitude. Does your Mom live alone ? Or have any care packages in place?
I ended up paying for Mom to go into respite in a nursing home I chose as they wanted to send her miles away, then it took me months to get an assessment and appointment with SS. However she was safe and had support of nursing staff and good contact with GP.
Thank you Melli, my Mum lives with my uncle since my Dad died. His health is also poor (aged 86) and they have always been very independent so the only care they have is a cleaner who comes into the house twice a week. With your Mum, how did you get her out of hospital prior to a full assessment, at the moment would be happy to do this if we can find a suitable care home. I really don’t want her sitting in a hospital bed declining in her mental health. Ak
 

melli

Registered User
Dec 9, 2021
41
0
Hi I researched local homes that the respite care and checked their vacancies, I then spoke to the hospital and they liaised with the home and discharged her into their care while we waited for an assessment, the down side is as Scarlet lady says they then don’t pay you have to and it runs up quickly, however I felt she was safer there. One thing to check is discharge policy within the home as my Mom had to be quarantined for 2 weeks after being discharged from a hospital setting, I found the nursing home to be very knowledgeable and helpful as I didn’t understand any of the processes and pitfalls
 

SydK2021

New member
Dec 10, 2021
5
0
Thank you
Hi, @AlanKearle and welcome to TP. Hopefully, you’ll find lots of advice going forward.
I'm sure lots of us recognise the situation you’re in. People with dementia generally speaking don’t cope well in hospital, although I appreciate that your mum hasn’t got a diagnosis yet. There’s not a lot of joined-up thinking going on at hospitals at the moment, so if they’re concentrating on her heart issues, maybe the mental issues will take a bit of a back seat.
However, whatever happens, you can be assured that they will want to discharge her ASAP into a care facility (usually a care home) so if everyone is agreed she isn’t ready to go home, somewhere else will have to be found. They may well suggest you arrange this, at little notice. Do not agree to this. It is not your job. The hospital social worker needs to take over and find suitable care. This should be what is termed assessment/reablement care in a suitable facility, within the person’s local authority. The LA will provide COVID Funding for the first four weeks of care, after which there should be a best interests meeting with the family and all other interested parties to see how best to go forward. The hospital social worker is the best person to get the ball rolling. Not the best time of year to be doing this, but just one of those things. Good luck, hope it gets sorted soon.
Thank you so much for your response really helpful - I’m not sure that hospital is the right place for her as her decline is very worrying and lack of any stimulation in a geriatric ward very worrying. We just want to get an assessment done as quickly as possible so we can agree a way forward. With Xmas coming up soon would prefer her to be safe in a care home, if that’s the best solution, than be stuck in a hospital ward where care isn’t that great. Thanks again much appreciated.
 

SydK2021

New member
Dec 10, 2021
5
0
Hi I researched local homes that the respite care and checked their vacancies, I then spoke to the hospital and they liaised with the home and discharged her into their care while we waited for an assessment, the down side is as Scarlet lady says they then don’t pay you have to and it runs up quickly, however I felt she was safer there. One thing to check is discharge policy within the home as my Mom had to be quarantined for 2 weeks after being discharged from a hospital setting, I found the nursing home to be very knowledgeable and helpful as I didn’t understand any of the processes and pitfalls
Great thank you, info is a great help.
 

Frank24

Registered User
Feb 13, 2018
420
0
I have been through this several times and believe most hospital wards are a dangerous place for people with dementia to be. I can understand how you are feeling. You’ve had some good advice here. Do you hold POA for your Mum?
 

SydK2021

New member
Dec 10, 2021
5
0
I have been through this several times and believe most hospital wards are a dangerous place for people with dementia to be. I can understand how you are feeling. You’ve had some good advice here. Do you hold POA for your Mum?
We have financial POA and am speaking to our solicitor tomorrow about medical POA which hopefully should be quite easy given my Mums condition. Thanks very much for your response much appreciated
 

Frank24

Registered User
Feb 13, 2018
420
0
It’s very important to get Health and welfare POA if you can… it’s key to be able to make decisions about where someone resides but financial POA is also really helpful x