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How to get mum diagnosed?


Registered User
Sep 26, 2015
Hi there, my mum is in her late 70's and is the sole carer for my Dad who is immobile.
Lately she has become very loathe to take decisions, to change anything about their routine, and becomes very anxious if anything new is suggested. She and Dad have become very thin and they have fallen a couple of times. She often cannot remember the events of the previous day and repeats the same conversations again and again. We have tried to arrange extra help for them, physiotherapy, BUPA appointments and nothing happens because she cancels everything. We think this is early Alzheimers but how do we go about getting it diagnosed?


Registered User
Jan 4, 2014
North Hampshire
Welcome to TP Greycardi

In the first instance you need to get your Mum's GP to see her and he will refer her to the memory clinic if he thinks it's appropriate.

If your Mum is cancelling all appointments, getting her to the GP could be a problem. I think in your shoes I'd be tempted to call and see their GP (or write a letter) explaining the situation and seeing if the Dr can go out and visit them at home.

There is a lot of advice both here on TP and also on the main Alzheimer's Society web site.

A good starting point may be the link below:


Do keep posting.



Registered User
Aug 24, 2013
Hi Graycardi, welcome to TP
All of what you're saying rings bells; routine, anxious not to change, falls, weight loss and all the rest. You really need to phone the "name of the relevant authority" followed by the phrase "vulnerable adult" and get an assessment done, they have to do it and it's free.
What they can do is assess the person/people in their own home and tell you what they think should be put in place, who pays for what.
Unless they feel they are at serious risk they won't actually intervene but they can recommend some assistance which maybe BUPA might have to pay for.
When you have A Social Services assessment BUPA might find it hard to argue they don't have to do anything.
Before you go headlong into getting a diagnosis there are other issues to be considered: is their house tenants in common or joint tenants, the whole business of how wills are written can be very important when care cost are involved and other issues so getting a things sorted before you get a diagnosis before he/she "lacks capacity" is probably best.
The way you manage the situation is the most important thing, doing what's in their best interest whilst at the same time looking after yourself.
My best tip would be say a bit more (obviously only if you want to) about ages and distances, you'd maybe get more accurate advice if we knew they were 100 miles away and in their 90's, distance caring is much harder in a way than being in the same house every day.