I think you need to get rid of the person who told you to get rid of the dog.......definitely not the dog
Here is a bit of a check list Age UK will send someone to help you with the forms for Attendance Allowance if you ask - they are tricky, I help lots of people with them because it is hard to do them without support
If you have an Admiral Nurse in your area (you will need to google it) then lots of people have said how helpful they are.
You can phone Social Services Adult Care Duty Desk and ask for an assessment if there have been no recommendations from the Unit - services like carers visiting to help with the daily routine/personal care or day care that should be an option - a day centre where your OH can go for lunch and activities. As well as our social services centre we also have Crossroads Day Centre where people can go for up to 3 days
It is worth googling Dementia activities + your area to see what is going on. There is probably a fair bit but you need to search for it. Some care homes also do 'day care' which can be useful but I would try the day centres first
You can also ask social services for a carers assessment - this will give you a break and give you some 'free' hours of help possibly. it might seem early days to be thinking of a 'break' but a few hours here and there is a good idea from as early on as you can. Everyone should have a carers assessment - it makes a big difference and helps people carry on caring for longer.
If you are not already getting it do apply for Attendance Allowance - the forms are a bit tricky in that you have to imagine the worst possible day and write down the help that OH needs (not the help that he gets but what he NEEDS). Attendance Allowance is not means tested and you should get it, if you need some help with the forms come back and ask Age UK are really good at helping with assessing what benefits you can claim and then they also help you fill in the forms - someone will come to your house. Age UK are also very good at practical advice and help - Age UK Advice line free national advice line that is open 365 days a year 24 hours a day. To talk to someone, just call 0800 169 2081.
I would strongly advise you to join your local carers organisation - they usually have a carers cafe (and so do Alzheimers society in some areas) and it is worth a morning off to go and find out what help there is in your area over a cup of coffee - lots of friendship and support face to face and everyone in the same boat.
If there are issues with incontinence all areas have a continence service - you will need to look up your Trust or google your area plus Continence Service. The continence nurses we have had have been wonderful and pads are supplied free by the NHS.
The Dementia helpline is a useful number to have
Alzheimer's Society National Dementia Helpline 0300 222 1122 can provide information, support, guidance and signposting to other appropriate organisations.
The Helpline is usually open from:
9am - 8pm Monday to Wednesday
9am - 5pm on Thursday and Friday
10am - 4pm on Saturday and Sunday
Come back and ask if there is anything you need to know - someone will know or can give practical tips or has had experience of it.