How to come to terms!

[mumstheword64!]

Hi I'm new to all this and really don't know where to start. I think I have been in denial up until recently, when I repeatedly asked mum to get into the bath and she couldn't understand what she was doing and kept asking me what she is doing. It was so sad to watch.

My mum got diagnosed with Alzheimer's just over 4yrs ago. She is deteriorating rapidly and it's like she's given up completely (I know it's the illness) she doesn't do anything for herself.

I don't know what to say to her anymore, she gets so frustrated with herself that she can't communicate like she did. Life isn't the same without my old mum! We used to talk and laugh all the time and we spent as much time as we could together, now she can't hold a conversation or even want to try.

I'm missing my mum so much its heart breaking, not being able to talk to her without her forgetting or giving me advice. :, (

 

[Grannie G]

Have a look at this @mumstheword64!

https://forum.alzheimers.org.uk/threads/compassionate-communication-with-the-memory-impaired.30801/

Your mum can`t change how she is but a different approach might make it easier for you to get through to her and continue your relationship.

Welcome to the forum. I hope you get the support and help you need.

 

[mumstheword64!]

Thank you for the information

 

[nae sporran]

Welcome to DTP from me too @mumstheword64!. Would your mum accept outside carers coming in to help with her bath time? Using the compassionate communication guidelines Sylvia suggested will help you on that score, but having professionals take some of the strain on more personal matters might also help you both.

 

[AztecCamera87]

I wish I knew how to come to terms with things, in just over a year my dad has gone from being my mum's primary carer (she died from cancer in August 2018) to being a shell of the person he was. I just don't understand how things have declined so rapidly.