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How to approach care so I can have a break

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
1,923
0
Moreton, Wirral. UK.
My youngest brother, who is single, has asked me to accompany him on a 19 day fly cruise to the Hawaiian Islands in September and I know it would cause some issues. Firstly Pauline herself, and how and when to raise it with her as because of Lockdown she thinks I am a fixture and secondly care. For her. Two of her sons refusing to acknowledge her or the dementia and the other is great with phone calls but cant see how he could give her the time. She isn't in need of a carehome and up to now no need for visiting carers. Quandary all round as I see it and dont know who to talk to first so any (all) advice appreciated, thank you.
 

DennyD

Registered User
Dec 6, 2016
182
0
Porthcawl, South Wales
As suggested by Sylvia an opportunity for her to join dementiaadventure.co.uk looks worth exploring. If not, can arrangements be made for a visiting befriender, maybe Age Concern could give advice. Or how about local Alzheimer's Society volunteering services. How do you think she will react if you tell her you've been invited to go away with your brother? Sorry, I don't feel I can give any helpful/practical advice but I do hope you can get something sorted as it would be a great opportunity.
 

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
1,923
0
Moreton, Wirral. UK.
This really does seem too good an opportunity to miss @Agzy

Is there any chance Pauline would accept a holiday apart from you while you `visit` your brother?

Thanks Sylvia, when I looked all except Lake District booked up but as I fancied the Lakes showed pics etc to Pauline who was concerned about how long and if a TV so ignored the latter and she agreed to former of 5 days. However when I tried to book it it looks like adjoining rooms for 4 people so have emailed to clarify but hope they do for two as it is a good break for early June. Appreciate this, thanks again
 

Agzy

Registered User
Nov 16, 2016
1,923
0
Moreton, Wirral. UK.
As suggested by Sylvia an opportunity for her to join dementiaadventure.co.uk looks worth exploring. If not, can arrangements be made for a visiting befriender, maybe Age Concern could give advice. Or how about local Alzheimer's Society volunteering services. How do you think she will react if you tell her you've been invited to go away with your brother? Sorry, I don't feel I can give any helpful/practical advice but I do hope you can get something sorted as it would be a great opportunity.
No, @DennyD , every idea is welcome and explored, when I showed her the Lakes option photos and she agreed to come with me if it can be booked I mentioned me going with my brother and she said yes, but wont remember it but for me it is acceptance. Our local Alzheimer’s office closed down 18 months ago and so no local contacts but there is an age uk office and I will give them a ring about befreinding and how to go about it without Pauline realising it is any form of care as she will resist vehemently, thank you