HOW MANY DONT KNOWS DOES IT TAKE?

[Norrms]

How many DONT KNOWS does it take ??

SOUND FAMILIAR?

E ..."What's the matter?
ME... Don't Know!
E... "You Must know?
ME... Don't Know?
E... "How do you feel?
ME... Don't Know!
E... "You must know how you feel?
ME... Don't Know!
E... "How can I help if you don't tell me ??
ME... Don't Know!

And so it goes on. this will sound very familiar I think to those who look after someone with dementia and the truth is sometimes WE DONT KNOW! No matter how many times we are asked there are no answers because no answers will come to mind. you see we know we are ill and we know we get confused, though sometimes we don't remember why. The frustration hits the boiling point and BANG all hell lets loose and it all comes out

"I`m Useless
I Hate this
I can't do anything anymore
I am of no use to you anymore
I`m just a burden
My life is over
I want everything to go away

Once again, so on and so on, and sometimes even much worse, but please, believe me, that's just the frustration coming out. and more importantly ITS NOT YOUR FAULT !!! You, meaning Carers loved ones etc, do what you do and do it so very well, you possibly couldn't do anymore and its so appreciated, but sometimes we forget that because 1, we have dementia and 2, cannot see a way out of this, because unfortunately there is no way out of it, and?
THATS THE MOST FRUSTRATING BIT
Please Know we really don't mean it, and if anybody thinks its all Roses and Wine in our House
THINK AGAIN !!! Either that or ask those closest to us
Hope this helps, Please share
Norrms, Diagnosed with dementia

 

[WA123]

Thank you for this. You put it so clearly.

 

[Norrms]

Thank you xxxxxxxxxx

 

[tryingmybest]

My Mum and I have exactly the same conversations. Xx

 

[PJ]

Hi @Norrms this has been me the past 2 days I’ve been in a really dark place which isn’t like me. My husband has begged me to talk to him about the feelings but I can’t explain? Which is so frustrating.
Am I right in saying you also have bvFTD?

 

[Agzy]

How many DONT KNOWS does it take ??

SOUND FAMILIAR?

E ..."What's the matter?
ME... Don't Know!
E... "You Must know?
ME... Don't Know?
E... "How do you feel?
ME... Don't Know!
E... "You must know how you feel?
ME... Don't Know!
E... "How can I help if you don't tell me ??
ME... Don't Know!

And so it goes on. this will sound very familiar I think to those who look after someone with dementia and the truth is sometimes WE DONT KNOW! No matter how many times we are asked there are no answers because no answers will come to mind. you see we know we are ill and we know we get confused, though sometimes we don't remember why. The frustration hits the boiling point and BANG all hell lets loose and it all comes out

"I`m Useless
I Hate this
I can't do anything anymore
I am of no use to you anymore
I`m just a burden
My life is over
I want everything to go away

Once again, so on and so on, and sometimes even much worse, but please, believe me, that's just the frustration coming out. and more importantly ITS NOT YOUR FAULT !!! You, meaning Carers loved ones etc, do what you do and do it so very well, you possibly couldn't do anymore and its so appreciated, but sometimes we forget that because 1, we have dementia and 2, cannot see a way out of this, because unfortunately there is no way out of it, and?
THATS THE MOST FRUSTRATING BIT
Please Know we really don't mean it, and if anybody thinks its all Roses and Wine in our House
THINK AGAIN !!! Either that or ask those closest to us
Hope this helps, Please share
Norrms, Diagnosed with dementia

Thank you for this Norrms, I have leaned a lot as a caregiver, from your poetry and other sources but to read this is a revelation and answers questions I ask myself constantly, sort of believing that Pauline can some how bring forth the ‘common sense’ that she used to have in abundance and tell it sensibly as I see it. Although I know this isn’t the case I still get short tempered at what I some times feel are deliberate actions just to get her own way. Now I know this to not be so thanks to your post as it has restored my understanding of this illness which I had somehow lost sight of. Truly grateful.

 

[Norfolk Cherry]

Sending a cyber hug Norrms x

 

[Norrms]

Hi @Norrms this has been me the past 2 days I’ve been in a really dark place which isn’t like me. My husband has begged me to talk to him about the feelings but I can’t explain? Which is so frustrating.
Am I right in saying you also have bvFTD?

No i have lewy bodys my friend x

 

[Norrms]

Sending a cyber hug Norrms x

Thank you x

 

[Norrms]

Thank you for this Norrms, I have leaned a lot as a caregiver, from your poetry and other sources but to read this is a revelation and answers questions I ask myself constantly, sort of believing that Pauline can some how bring forth the ‘common sense’ that she used to have in abundance and tell it sensibly as I see it. Although I know this isn’t the case I still get short tempered at what I some times feel are deliberate actions just to get her own way. Now I know this to not be so thanks to your post as it has restored my understanding of this illness which I had somehow lost sight of. Truly grateful.

You are very welcomed my frfiend x

 

[Norrms]

My Mum and I have exactly the same conversations. Xx

thank you xx

 

[Jean1234]

How many DONT KNOWS does it take ??

SOUND FAMILIAR?

E ..."What's the matter?
ME... Don't Know!
E... "You Must know?
ME... Don't Know?
E... "How do you feel?
ME... Don't Know!
E... "You must know how you feel?
ME... Don't Know!
E... "How can I help if you don't tell me ??
ME... Don't Know!

And so it goes on. this will sound very familiar I think to those who look after someone with dementia and the truth is sometimes WE DONT KNOW! No matter how many times we are asked there are no answers because no answers will come to mind. you see we know we are ill and we know we get confused, though sometimes we don't remember why. The frustration hits the boiling point and BANG all hell lets loose and it all comes out

"I`m Useless
I Hate this
I can't do anything anymore
I am of no use to you anymore
I`m just a burden
My life is over
I want everything to go away

Once again, so on and so on, and sometimes even much worse, but please, believe me, that's just the frustration coming out. and more importantly ITS NOT YOUR FAULT !!! You, meaning Carers loved ones etc, do what you do and do it so very well, you possibly couldn't do anymore and its so appreciated, but sometimes we forget that because 1, we have dementia and 2, cannot see a way out of this, because unfortunately there is no way out of it, and?
THATS THE MOST FRUSTRATING BIT
Please Know we really don't mean it, and if anybody thinks its all Roses and Wine in our House
THINK AGAIN !!! Either that or ask those closest to us
Hope this helps, Please share
Norrms, Diagnosed with dementia

As a carer THANK YOU .

 

[emmamac]

Thank you....xx

 

[PJ]

No i have lewy bodys my friend x

Sorry to hear that.