My husband has been in care for 18 months and still says "when are we going home" - especially later in the day, but he said that continuously for the last few months he was at home, getting more and more agitated. If I can distract him enough and leave at a good moment I manage to get out before he starts saying it. He doesnt say it to the staff, although he does try and open doors. I trigger the "going home" syndrome - but I know its his childhood home he is thinking of, as he also says he has to see his mum and dad.
It is so distressing, and just worsens the guilt feeling as he is a secure building with only a little bedroom to call his own, and he came from a lovely house in a little village in lovely countryside.
The care home is very nice (he thinks he built it as he was a builder) and he often says how nice it is there, but that doesnt stop him in the next breath saying he doesnt like being there with all those people and wants to go home
I take him out to the theatre or a pub or a walk with the dog when I can.
I actually took him home just before Christmas for the evening and night, as his son and grandson were staying for the night and his granddaughters were coming over as well, and we had a lovely evening - he seemed to recognise the house - but he wouldnt go to bed or even sleep in a chair and I had to stay awake with him all night in the kitchen with him occasionally saying he had to go home, and me saying yes we will when it gets light.
They dont ever forget "home" as the home in their head is somewhere way in the past with their mum and dad where they were safe and secure,and thats where they want to be to escape from the terrible fear and confusion that they have to live with now