• All threads and posts regarding Coronavirus COVID-19 can be found in our area specifically for Coronavirus COVID-19 discussion.

    You can directly access this area >here<.

How long does it take to get into a nursing home?

Nightshade01

Registered User
Nov 24, 2019
92
0
I'm 37 and caring for my mum who is 74. My uncle showed signs of Dementia in 2015 and he got taken into a care home last year. His older brother who is 82 got taken into one earlier this year. I am still living at home with my Mum. A care package has not yet been put in place. This is now the fourth month. I would like to move out but she doesn't want to be living in the house on her own. Also, I had to deal with horrible bullying neighbours for the past few years and I feel if I'm nearly destroyed because of it. I haven't been fit to go to work since 2019.

I asked the social worker how long will it take for my mum to get into respite. He said he needs to speak to his manager and it's not that simple. I told the nurse a couple of weeks ago to make it permanent as we want to sell this house. I just wish they will hurry up as I'm fed up with still waiting. My mum's health is deteriorating. I find it difficult to deal with her behaviour. I cooked her eggs for her dinner the other day, which she ate. Later she told me she thought she hadn't eaten then she cooked more and eat them. I don't know how much longer I will have to deal with this. She has become too dependent on me now.
 

Jessbow

Registered User
Mar 1, 2013
3,706
0
West Hertfordshire
If she is self funding you dont nee anyones approval, you just crack on and arrange it wih the home of your choice.

Does she live in your home, or you in hers?
 

Nightshade01

Registered User
Nov 24, 2019
92
0
She owns the house. I was told earlier a care package is not in place. But someone will be coming around to give her medication. I got told earlier that when I move out my mum will also be moved. Which is good news. All I need to do now is start looking again.
 

Rosettastone57

Registered User
Oct 27, 2016
1,593
0
As others have said, with self funders, you don't need social services approval, just organise it
 

Jaded'n'faded

Registered User
Jan 23, 2019
2,026
0
High Peak
If your mother would be happy to move into a care home and she would be funding it, there's no problem.

If she wishes to remain in her home and you move out she will need carers in place.

Do you have Power of Attorney? Will the house need to be sold to fund her care at some point?
 

Cazcaz

Registered User
Apr 3, 2021
160
0
She owns the house. I was told earlier a care package is not in place. But someone will be coming around to give her medication. I got told earlier that when I move out my mum will also be moved. Which is good news. All I need to do now is start looking again.
If she owns the house, do you have sufficient funds to get a place of your own es as you are not working? You won’t be able to access the funds from selling the house, or any of her savings.
 

Nightshade01

Registered User
Nov 24, 2019
92
0
If your mother would be happy to move into a care home and she would be funding it, there's no problem.

If she wishes to remain in her home and you move out she will need carers in place.

Do you have Power of Attorney? Will the house need to be sold to fund her care at some point?
The house will be going up for sale.
 

Nightshade01

Registered User
Nov 24, 2019
92
0
If she owns the house, do you have sufficient funds to get a place of your own es as you are not working? You won’t be able to access the funds from selling the house, or any of her savings.
I'm on universal credit and I'm bidding on the property pool website.
 

Eogz

Registered User
Sep 9, 2021
27
0
I'm on universal credit and I'm bidding on the property pool website.
Hi, Are you LPA (Lasting Power of Attorney for your Mum?). There are two kinds, Finances and Health & Welfare.

Also from the sounds of it, a Nursing Home appears to be a high level of care for her, unless he has any health conditions that require a nurse or behavioural issues that require specialist intervention.
You may want to consider looking at EMD registered homes, they are Dementia specialist care homes with trained staff, not all are great but there are some lovely places.

Another option is live in care at home, if you are LPA, you can make the decision to pay for live in care, it can be the same as a care home but a more healthy environment for people.

There are many options still available and it sounds like the social worker isn't very considerate of your needs as well.

Have you been put in touch with Carers support groups, offered a Carers Assessment and other things.

It may be worth chatting to your local carers advocacy service to get to know what support is available and also what your rights are.
Hope that helps.