1. Expert Q&A: Protecting a person with dementia from financial abuse - Weds 26 June, 3:30-4:30 pm

    Financial abuse can have serious consequences for a person with dementia. Find out how to protect a person with dementia from financial abuse.

    Sam, our Knowledge Officer (Legal and Welfare Rights) is our expert on this topic. She will be here to answer your questions on Wednesday 26 June between 3:30 - 4:30 pm.

    You can either post questions >here< or email them to us at talkingpoint@alzheimers.org.uk and we'll answer as many as we can on the day.

  1. kungfu

    kungfu Registered User

    Mar 23, 2008
    1
    I fear this post is asking the impossible. I want to know how it feels for my grandfather, see the world through his eyes. He now lives in a home and he has advanced Alzheimer's. He sleeps a lot, stares blankly ahead, but has flashes of recognition. He can't really speak anymore and he looks puzzled. He doesn't recognise his family in any rational sense, but I sense he feels the bond between us and is comforted by us.
     
  2. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    68,668
    Kent
    We can only imagine.

    My husband is not yet at the stage of your grandfather. Sometimes he says he feels he is looking through a net curtain. At other times he says his brain feels foggy.
     
  3. annmitt

    annmitt Registered User

    Mar 20, 2008
    19
    Coventry
    How does it feel

    Like Sylvias husband, I don't think my mum is at your grandfathers stage. But my mum says her brains not working properly because she's getting old. She recognises us, but I'm not sure she knows who we are either. She is 80, but insists she's 81!
     
  4. lesmisralbles

    lesmisralbles Account Closed

    Nov 23, 2007
    5,543
    It is sunny

    Ron tell's me it is sunny.
    The Sunlight goes in his eyes, and then he cannot see. Then it is like a foggy experience. Mid sentence, he will go to sleep.
    I have no idea, why ?.
    Barb
     
  5. BeverleyY

    BeverleyY Registered User

    Jan 29, 2008
    716
    Ashford, Kent
    My Dad is not yet at the stage of your grandfather either.

    My Dad tells me his head is fuzzy sometimes.

    I don't think any of us can truly answer your question, because nobody has been to 'that place' and ever returned to document it.

    Beverley x
     
  6. gigi

    gigi Registered User

    Nov 16, 2007
    7,788
    East Midlands
    My husband will ask me why he can't remember..

    Then say he thinks he's going potty..

    then like Barb's Ron will fall asleep mid sentence..

    Kungfu..my husband is not at the stage your grandfather is at..but he is moving towards it.

    How can any of us know how it feels?

    I do believe that everyone's experience of dementia is different.
    As carers/family we can attempt to enter their world and be with them..to give love and kindness..and to be there.

    I'm sure your grandfather feels the bond and is comforted by you..
    try to make the most of the time you spend with him..talk to him..touch him..let him know you care.

    Love Gigi xx
     
  7. Margarita

    Margarita Registered User

    Feb 17, 2006
    10,824
    london
    #7 Margarita, Mar 24, 2008
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2008
    When I ask my mother how she feeling , she tell me her legs hurt her .

    what going on in her mind , is her thoughts she kindly tell me , when I ask her what she thinking .

    On a good day like today she tell me , she thinking about tomorrow at day center .

    when she upset because she done something wrong in her eyes , because she finding it harder to go to the toilet herself she tell me she so stupid what wrong with me .

    I don't tell her , because if only upset her more .

    I just hope that when she at the stage your grandfather is in she has no clarity of knowing what wrong with her , so she feel safe in her world of her reality in her mind , because I would hate to torment myself thinking that she does know .

    so from observing my mother over the years with her AZ/ VD , your only really no from they body language, if they
    agitated , relaxed looking when all speech has gone .

    PS

    Just like you say above he look puzzled so your reading his body language . so his looking at you with a puzzled look because he has no clarity of who you are .

    Then another day , may be a good day for him , he has clarity of who you are.
     
  8. clarethebear

    clarethebear Registered User

    Oct 16, 2007
    197
    manchester, uk
    Hi Kungfu

    As you say your question is impossible to answer. It would be nice to know if they do still feel the bond at this stage. All I can say is be there and show him the love even if he pushes you away try not to give up, as I'm sure somewhere deep down he remembers the love he once had for you.

    Take Care
    Clare
     

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