I very recently joined this forum and I am saddened to read some of the desperate calls for help daily on here. I am caring for my mam after finding myself 'still' here after the death of my father. Just tonight post titles such as "will I have to give up work" and "I can't cope" are resonating strongly with me and my sympathies go to you all. Today has been an awful day, after 4 days of no sleep, ranting, upset, and abuse, alongside worries of going bankrupt, yesterday I rang my mams GP, she put me onto the mental health team, who passed me onto social services. It was decided by social worker respite was needed. I was so grateful, I just cried. SW gave me the name of the care home and said she would be round in half hour with a member of their staff to do an assessment for a start tomorrow. Whilst wating their arrival I looked at the CQC report to find there are serious safeguarding problems at this care home. This is the first time I have considered respite, and I was shocked that Social services would do this. The home has rated 'needs improvement' and 'inadequate' across the board. So they came, I nearly didnt let them in but decided to see what they had to say. They explained to my poor mother that I was tired and needed a rest, and would she go to this care home that is really a hotel. She started screaming and shaking and I told them to go. They shot out so fast that one of them left their bag they couldn't get gone quickly enough. This is after 6 months of waiting for / asking for help such as sitters or a couple of hours off with no result. So tonight I am still here, mam is calmer but I am back to square one. How can it be the Social Services recommended a place that is unsafe? How can you trust anyone? A hotel?? She is sick but not daft. How insulting.