Home from hospital tomorrow

Discussion in 'I have a partner with dementia' started by Jinx, Feb 9, 2015.

  1. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    Due to pick OH up at 10 tomorrow, hope there are no last minute changes of plan like last week. OH has had a very nasty chest infection followed by some sort of stomach upset, possibly due to ABs or possibly hospital acquired but they assure me he is 'medically fit'. He's been in for 9 days.

    There's been a lot of chat from the hospital about SS because we still haven't had an assessment from the new lot since we moved at the end of December. I'm hoping this hospital stay might move things on but didn't want to keep B in hospital for no reason other than SS getting their act together. Problem is I don't know how much his mental state has deteriorated, he is very confused in hospital but that's understandable, just hoping he'll remember the new house a bit when I bring him back.




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  2. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,760
    Female
    Dundee
    Wishing you and your husband the best for his return. I hope he settles well and you get an assessment soon.
     
  3. jugglingmum

    jugglingmum Registered User

    Jan 5, 2014
    5,273
    Female
    Chester
    Hope all goes well. My mum was in hospital for 6 days and rehab for 12 after pneumonia.

    She needed help refreshing her memory of how she lived in her extra care flat and I was really worried for a few days, but 2 weeks later and all back to normal - of course no memory of hospital or rehab in care home.

    Moving from rehab to flat left her quite unsettled, like any change for those with dementia I suppose. Unlike my mum, where I couldnt' be on hand, although she got extra care visits for a few days, you will be on hand to look after him and reestablish the routine.

    Hope all goes OK.
     
  4. truth24

    truth24 Registered User

    Oct 13, 2013
    5,725
    North Somerset
    Hope all goes well for you and your OH is happy to be home.

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  5. Scarlett123

    Scarlett123 Registered User

    Apr 30, 2013
    3,802
    Essex
    Hope everything goes smoothly for you both. xxx
     
  6. Chuggalug

    Chuggalug Registered User

    Mar 24, 2014
    8,007
    Norfolk
    Rooting for you, Jinx. How's it all going?
     
  7. LadyA

    LadyA Registered User

    Oct 19, 2009
    13,529
    Ireland
    Hope all goes well - and don't be "behind the door" in trying to get the hospital to light a fuse under SS! Keep pestering - after all, the squeaky wheel gets the most grease!;)
     
  8. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    My lovely daughter sent an email to the lady at the local Alzheimer's Society (AS) today asking about day care and just mentioning that we hadn't had a SS assessment and that I really need more day care for OH in order that I can continue working. The AS lady contacted a couple of people in SS and suggested that if we didn't hear anything within a week then the AS advocacy service might need to step in. Lo and behold I had a call from SS, two in fact, and I have now been allocated a SW who will come and do the assessments early next week.

    OH is home, very tired, appears more confused and less able to find the right words, but hoping sleep and a return to routine over the next few days will help.


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  9. esmeralda

    esmeralda Registered User

    Nov 27, 2014
    3,072
    Devon
    Hop you both have a good night Jinx, and your OH settles back in well.
    Es
    x
     
  10. truth24

    truth24 Registered User

    Oct 13, 2013
    5,725
    North Somerset
    Adding my good wishes too.

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  11. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    Well last night not so brilliant wee score: bedroom carpet 1, bathroom floor 1, PJs 1, toilet 1, hoping for more coherence tonight, not to mention more sleep, vain hope I think as he insisted on going to bed at 7.30.


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  12. patchworkamber

    patchworkamber Registered User

    Jan 6, 2014
    45
    south east wales
    Hi Jinx,
    Likewise my OH has been home from hospital a week now but the infection has upped his VD a few notches I'm afraid but we are getting into a routine but would not be able to leave him in the house now for me to go back to part time work. We are waiting an assessment and an OT is coming next week as he has mobility issues but when I mentioned going back to work it took her by surprise so she will discuss with the SW ... Does anyone know about how this works please? Direct payments? And i understand that there is new legislation from 1st April. Do let me know how you get on and we could compare notes!
    All the best.
     
  13. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    Hi Patchworkamber, I still work full time but mainly from home apart from meetings and client visits. My husband needs 24/7 supervision so I am his main carer and have direct payments to buy in care when I have to be away, which had been working OK. OH goes to day care a couple of days, well 12 till 4. We moved house at the end of December and what with that and the stay in hospital he has become very restless in the afternoons and keeps coming to find me and doesn't understand that I need him to leave me in peace especially when I'm on the phone. I am going to have to get more help in the afternoons.

    Bigger problem is no or very little sleep, he was up literally every hour last night and it's difficult to function efficiently during the day when you're sleep deprived.

    I really don't want to give up work, OH only has a small pension and never saved or made any provision so I am entirely reliant on making my own provision for pension etc.

    I would hold out for for direct payments and make sure when you're assessed that you include time for you; hobbies, shopping, exercise etc. as well as your work commitments. Good luck.


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  14. patchworkamber

    patchworkamber Registered User

    Jan 6, 2014
    45
    south east wales
    Thank you for taking the time to reply, especially being so sleep deprived, i do feel for you. I will try and pursue the direct payments, once the assessment is done of course and thanks for the reminder about remembering to include time out for me, not just for work. My OH is a sleepy head and up about 4 times in the night to pee, usually, except for the floor and the bed at times! I have to find tv programmes, old films etc to keep him awake in between naps...
     
  15. Jinx

    Jinx Registered User

    Mar 13, 2014
    2,333
    Pontypool
    We have the same problem here with naps in the daytime. He likes animal programmes and Andre Rieu DVDs but he can't really follow programmes with a story line now. A few weeks ago he would read The Times from cover to cover but now he hardly glances at it and doesn't read anything else either. It gets harder and harder to know what to suggest. I'm going to see what SS suggest on Monday but may have to see if I can get more hours so I can get carers to take him out a couple of afternoons. He's now saying he hates day care and doesn't want to go but I think I'll have to insist it's good for him to get out and do something different.


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