Hi from Ireland

lizf

Registered User
Nov 11, 2013
9
0
Dublin, Ireland
Hello all
I'm moved back to Ireland 5yrs ago, this week, to care for my Mum. She'd become increasingly frail and lonely so it just had to be done. I'd moved from home and Ireland at 17yrs old so it was a big change for us both.
She's 93 now, and we live together with my sanity saver, Sparkle dog.
After a particularly difficult 24hrs, the penny has just dropped for me….I need some support. A real lightbulb moment.
So glad I found this forum and I've even dug out the card of a social worker I was given months ago, will phone her later.
Essentially I do this completely alone, no others carers. This is my day off as she goes to a day hospital every Monday but that more a little social club no support or input from there. I have a cousin that calls for a couple of hours every fortnight. I have no other family or long term friends here. I have made 1 really good friend since coming back, when she can she'll sit with Mum if i need to do something.
I feel as if i'm alway on call, most of the time i cope really well, but at times i get so frustrated, tired, irritated. Feel as if my head might implode.
Like this morning after 3hrs sleep trying to explain to Mum for the 5th time why she needed to take pain meds before her journey on the ambulance…then notice the tablet has gone from the table, mum says she hasn't taken it but i can't find it anywhere, can't give her another as it would be too much. I'd tried so hard to make it understandable for her. so i just lose it…getting snappy with her..feel immediately guilty..then kick
myself as i realize how i could have avoided this situation by approaching it differently
A little rant:)
I just haven't adjusted yet to the change in her cognitive abilities, it is so variable, hour to hour, so i get taken by surprise.
Anyhoo got that off my chest, thank you
looking forward to speaking with you all
liz
 

Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
81,443
0
Kent
Hello Liz

I think you are amazing, looking after your mother full time with only part of one day a week respite.

You`ll be in good company here and I hope the support you will get is just what you need and helps you feel less isolated.
 

nita

Registered User
Dec 30, 2011
2,651
0
Essex
Hi Liz. I have a problem with my mother taking pills too. In case she drops them, I find the only way is to make sure she puts them in her mouth and then swallows enough water for them to go down. Sometimes, I actually get her to open her mouth and put the pill in myself. Another difficulty is when she is very sleepy and doesn't want to take them, so I have to try and catch a time when she is more alert.

You will have to find out what support services are available where you live. Is it possible you could have carers come in at certain times of the day to help or she could go to a specialist day centre some days? The Social Worker will be your first port of call.