Hi everyone - newly joined


Registered User
Mar 24, 2008
Hi Ive just joined so I thought Id introduce myself.Im Hils my mother is 87 and suffers alzheimers.Following a collapse in January and after some episodes of wandering I had to take the really tough decision to put her into a care home. I suffer from the guilt of this daily.My Mum lives up north and myself down south. I took the decision to place her in a care home up there so that her other relatives would still be able to see her. The care home is good but her eating has deteriorated and the staff struggle to get her to eat enough. Unfortunately she does not recognise me or any of her other relatives at all now> She just about did when she was at home but I guess she sees so many more people now we have just melted into the crowd. She also often asks to go home but this is difficult to judge as she did this even when she was at home
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Registered User
Mar 7, 2004
Hello Hils, welcome to TP.

You did the proper thing in getting your mum cared for 24/7, especially when you were so far away. Please try not to feel guilty, it is a negative emotion.

You say that mum asks to go home, and that she did that even when she lived at home. All part and parcel of the dementia.

Recognition of loved ones and friends is another. All too often this goes, but this happens too sometimes, even when they remain at home.

Please stay on the forum with us, and ask away about anything specific. You will tap into a wealth of knowledge and understanding here.