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Help !!!

Gordine

Registered User
Sep 27, 2015
2
Although my husband was tested for dementia only 5 months ago and passed the test with flying colours, he was admitted to hospital on 24th July and on Wednesday of last week had an MRI and lumbar puncture which resulted in him being diagnosed with 3rd stage dementia. He is 73 and we put his memory blips down to his age. No one can understand how this has happened so quickly. I am totally alone, family living away and don't know where to turn for help and advice. It is heart breaking seeing him like this, especially when he only recognises (AT TIMES) myself and my son. He is constantly trying to get out of the hospital, even trying to wheel the bed and all the rest of his room out to bring them home. When first admitted, in his mind, the hospital was a hotel and all the staff worked in there and in the attached garage. He has gone from being the most mild mannered man anyone could ever wish to meet to being agitated, aggressive and attacking the staff. The NHS nurses and doctors are SAINTS to put up with what he is putting them through. He is on one to one care as he keeps falling. He has always said if he ever got dementia I should shoot him, he would be devastated if he knew what he is now doing.
Anyone any advice PLEASE.
 

Soobee

Registered User
Aug 22, 2009
2,734
South
I am sorry to hear about your husband's sudden decline. I assume the hospital are trying to rule out other causes for these changes. Unfortunately some people can change very quickly from one stage to another. Often it is hard to tell whether there is a cause unrelated to dementia or normal progression of the illness.

Please take a look around the site and look at some of the factsheets if you haven't already.
changes in behaviour
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?documentID=159

dementia and aggressive behaviour
http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?documentID=96
 

Jinx

Registered User
Mar 13, 2014
2,333
Pontypool
Although my husband was tested for dementia only 5 months ago and passed the test with flying colours, he was admitted to hospital on 24th July and on Wednesday of last week had an MRI and lumbar puncture which resulted in him being diagnosed with 3rd stage dementia. He is 73 and we put his memory blips down to his age. No one can understand how this has happened so quickly. I am totally alone, family living away and don't know where to turn for help and advice. It is heart breaking seeing him like this, especially when he only recognises (AT TIMES) myself and my son. He is constantly trying to get out of the hospital, even trying to wheel the bed and all the rest of his room out to bring them home. When first admitted, in his mind, the hospital was a hotel and all the staff worked in there and in the attached garage. He has gone from being the most mild mannered man anyone could ever wish to meet to being agitated, aggressive and attacking the staff. The NHS nurses and doctors are SAINTS to put up with what he is putting them through. He is on one to one care as he keeps falling. He has always said if he ever got dementia I should shoot him, he would be devastated if he knew what he is now doing.
Anyone any advice PLEASE.
My husband had a mini stroke nearly two years ago (one of many he has suffered over a long period of time) and was admitted to hospital because they thought his heart wasn't functioning properly. Up to that point his memory hadn't been good and he was getting to the point where he didn't like being alone for too long but nothing more serious. overnight he became extremely agitated, so much so they had to get a special bed on floor level as they were worried he would fall. He got very assertive, verging on aggressive. At that point I had no diagnosis of dementia. I was terrified. I was advised to write a letter to the consultant saying that I couldn't consider having him home until I had support in place from Social Services. I worked full time, family have small children couldn't be expected to help etc. it took some time to get SS involved but eventually I got a team meeting with doctors, SW etc. a diagnosis and a care plan in place. Hubby had vascular dementia, needed 24/7 supervision and should no longer drive. However, when he came back home after seven weeks in hospital he was calmer, the agitation surfaces sometimes and he is prone to wandering but I have the support in place I can call on. Stand your ground as they will try to get you to take him home to free up the bed but make sure you have got Social Services involved. Being in unfamiliar surroundings and having things done to them that they don't understand causes agitation and aggression, hopefully he will gradually improve in familiar surroundings. Good luck. xx


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