The last couple of days have been bad for me, I feel like I'm gettin worse, and goin slightly out of control. It does worry me a bit as I am a Mum of three daughters and am finding it difficult to do normal day to day things. I'm afraid to say the wine came out @4.30 this arvo,I felt so anxious. Annoyed with myself that I was weak and had to do this. I just feel like I'm never gonna feel any different the way I do now... I'm worrying about my Dad, he looks so broken.. he even looks ill.. Will it really get easier for me? Do you know, I haven't even dreamt about my Mum yet, only disturbing ones about funeral homes and bodies.. Why? Am I going mad, or is this normal behaviour for someone who's Mum has died and her funeral was the first she'd been to? Anyway, I hope tomorrow I'm a sane Mummy, not a mad one.. Thanks for listening, sorry for waffling, but its good to talk isn't it? Nickyxxx