Hello everyone
This is my first post. I’m writing on behalf of my mum. She is 86 and the main carer for my dad, who’s 85. Dad has vascular dementia, is being treated for depression, has lost the use of his legs, can no longer stand at all, isn’t eating properly, can no longer use a knife and fork properly, wakes regularly and often during the night and calls for mum. He regularly has a go at her, accuses her of not caring, cannot understand why she won’t put him in his wheelchair to go out. Accuses her of being evil and of keeping him prisoner. His condition has deteriorated greatly over the last 3 months. They have carers going in 3 times a day to help dad. The carers have to use a hoist to move him from bed to chair, chair to commode, chair to bed. The hoist takes two people to use. Mum is astonishingly fit and capable but she can not move him on her own. Because of the Covid lockdown, my siblings and I cannot go into the house to help at all. The carers are great. Dad’s doctors, district nurse, OT have all been as supportive as possible but mum is exhausted. Unless someone can be in the house with mum, I don’t know if she will manage to keep going. We talk on the phone, but what else can we do? I am so worried. Apologies for the long message.
This is my first post. I’m writing on behalf of my mum. She is 86 and the main carer for my dad, who’s 85. Dad has vascular dementia, is being treated for depression, has lost the use of his legs, can no longer stand at all, isn’t eating properly, can no longer use a knife and fork properly, wakes regularly and often during the night and calls for mum. He regularly has a go at her, accuses her of not caring, cannot understand why she won’t put him in his wheelchair to go out. Accuses her of being evil and of keeping him prisoner. His condition has deteriorated greatly over the last 3 months. They have carers going in 3 times a day to help dad. The carers have to use a hoist to move him from bed to chair, chair to commode, chair to bed. The hoist takes two people to use. Mum is astonishingly fit and capable but she can not move him on her own. Because of the Covid lockdown, my siblings and I cannot go into the house to help at all. The carers are great. Dad’s doctors, district nurse, OT have all been as supportive as possible but mum is exhausted. Unless someone can be in the house with mum, I don’t know if she will manage to keep going. We talk on the phone, but what else can we do? I am so worried. Apologies for the long message.