Help with diagnosis

[CJPG7]

Hi,

I'm pretty sure that my mum has some form of dementia, but when my sister took her to the doctor last week she passed all the memory tests with flying colours, and put her change of behaviour down to the shock of losing her husband.

At the wake my cousin asked my mum if she wanted a drink, and she replied with "Someone is getting me one". That someone was my brother, her son, and she didn't know his name!

After the funeral she asked my sister what we were doing there, as if she didn't realise that it was a funeral, and didn't show any emotion. There have been lots of similar incidents over the last few months i.e. forgetting people's names, not knowing what day it is, or where she is, not taking her tablets, wetting herself etc. It's very worrying, and if she cannot be diagnosed then how can we treat it?

Any suggestions are very welcome.

Chris

 

[karaokePete]

Hello @CJPG7, you are welcome here and I hope you find the forum to be a friendly and supportive place.

A standard procedure is to make a written note of all concerns and behaviour changes and present it to the GP. They may not discuss your mum with you but they will read any notes. A history of behaviour is more important that the mini tests used by a GP as they can be next to useless with some people. My wife doesn't have any problem with those tests but has been diagnosed with dementia and has various brain damage evidenced by detailed scans.

Apart from this, please do take a good look around the site as it is a goldmine for information. When I first joined I read old threads for information but then found the AS Publications list and the page where a post code search can be done to check for support services in ones own area if a diagnosis is given. If you are interested in these, clicking the following links will take you there

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/publications-factsheets-full-list

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/find-support-near-you

You will see that there are Factsheets that will help with things that may become necessary like getting care needs assessments, deciding the level of care required and sorting out useful things like Wills, Power of Attorney etc.

Now that you have found us I hope you will keep posting as the membership has vast collective knowledge and experience.

 

[canary]

Hello @CJPG7 and welcome to Talking Point

Im afraid this is all too common.
My OH started showing symptoms after his mum died, but he passed the Mini Mental State Examination Test (what the GP would given your mum too) and was, over the next year his problems were variously described as grief, depression, a mid-life crisis and marital problems. Now, several years later, he can still pass the MMSE although no-one now doubts that he is in cognitive decline.

I would reccommend that you start keeping a diary of all the odd things that she is doing and then write a letter to her GP explaining your concerns. Eventually, it cant be hidden.


PS - there is very little in the way of treatment for dementia. There is nothing that can reverse, or even halt dementia. If it happens to be Alzheimers the there are a couple of drugs that can slow down the progression, but it doesnt always work and some people cannot tolerate it. For the most part treatment is for the symptoms of things like anxiety, aggression and paranoia, so dont worry too much that she is not getting any treatment at the moment, although, obviously, its best to start things as soon as possible, where possible.

 

[Guzelle]

I would write it all down and give it to the GP beforehand. I took my husband to the GP and he passed the test. He decided it might be his prostate and did tests for that! ??.

He said to me tell him to ring for the results I said “ he can’t do that” he asked “why not?” I said “he can’t remember how to use the phone.” He then said “well he has got you.”

I left the surgery feeling abandoned. I went back 6 months later after he had nearly killed us in the car and saw a different doctor and he referred him immediately to the memory clinic. He was then given mementine which helped him a lot. Also we then got attendance allowance and a deduction in council tax.

It is worth getting a diagnosis as you could pay for help if needed with Attendance allowance.

 

[CJPG7]

Hi,

I'm pretty sure that my mum has some form of dementia, but when my sister took her to the doctor last week she passed all the memory tests with flying colours, and put her change of behaviour down to the shock of losing her husband.

At the wake my cousin asked my mum if she wanted a drink, and she replied with "Someone is getting me one". That someone was my brother, her son, and she didn't know his name!

After the funeral she asked my sister what we were doing there, as if she didn't realise that it was a funeral, and didn't show any emotion. There have been lots of similar incidents over the last few months i.e. forgetting people's names, not knowing what day it is, or where she is, not taking her tablets, wetting herself etc. It's very worrying, and if she cannot be diagnosed then how can we treat it?

Any suggestions are very welcome.

Chris

Thanks a lot for the advice.

 

[CJPG7]

Hello @CJPG7 and welcome to Talking Point

Im afraid this is all too common.
My OH started showing symptoms after his mum died, but he passed the Mini Mental State Examination Test (what the GP would given your mum too) and was, over the next year his problems were variously described as grief, depression, a mid-life crisis and marital problems. Now, several years later, he can still pass the MMSE although no-one now doubts that he is in cognitive decline.

I would reccommend that you start keeping a diary of all the odd things that she is doing and then write a letter to her GP explaining your concerns. Eventually, it cant be hidden.


Thanks a lot for the advice. I have just started a diary, as you suggested.

 

[CJPG7]

I left the surgery feeling abandoned. I went back 6 months later after he had nearly killed us in the car and saw a different doctor and he referred him immediately to the memory clinic. He was then given mementine which helped him a lot. Also we then got attendance allowance and a deduction in council tax.

It is worth getting a diagnosis as you could pay for help if needed with Attendance allowance.

It sounds like you were very badly treated. Getting a referral to a Memory Clinic sounds like a good idea. I'll suggest that to her doctor.