Help?
I am also new to this I have no idea whether I am writing in the right place and feel wholly guilty for entering this and seemingly posting my own problem rather than replying to someone else who is suffering probably more so than myself... My grandfather has dementia they have never really told us how it was diagnosed or what form etc etc he never experienced any of the text book symptoms (no memory loss or shouting or distress or anything he just gradually seemed to dissolve as a person) and when we try to find out from GP etc what type/how diagnosed/etc etc now they say it makes no real difference as they do not feel he has that long. Degeneration seemed fairly rapid in my opinion and is still worsening compared to when I saw him about 3 months ago he used to look at me and would choose to hold my hand and smile and when asked a question could reply yes or no ... I went to visit on sunday last week and things have become so different he looks straight through me his mouth remains open he did not seem to acknowledge my dad (his son) or me at all and his hands just grip the chair then relax in repetitive movements he crosses and uncrosses his legs frequently but did not seem to acknowledge our presence or affection at all. He is no longer eating himself he is being fed pureed food and can only walk supported by two carers and I am completely destroyed by all this I cannot stop crying (god I sound so selfish!!!) I just wish someone could help him he cannot speak he does not seem to communicate whatsoever and is awake but so vacant and I love him so dearly I need to know what I can do to ease his pain I don't know what or how he feels he used to cry someimes when we left but now there is no emotion, no flicker or recognition nothing and this world is so cruel to do this to someone so lovely and adorable and it has completely destroyed me I had nightmares since seeing him just want to be with him all the time to cuddle him and tell him it will be ok but no one seems to know anything the carers at his home are lovely and tell me he is ok but how the hell can he be ok he can't tell us so how on earth do they know!!!!!!!! Can anyone help me understand and advise what I can do to ease his suffering PLEASE?
I am also new to this I have no idea whether I am writing in the right place and feel wholly guilty for entering this and seemingly posting my own problem rather than replying to someone else who is suffering probably more so than myself... My grandfather has dementia they have never really told us how it was diagnosed or what form etc etc he never experienced any of the text book symptoms (no memory loss or shouting or distress or anything he just gradually seemed to dissolve as a person) and when we try to find out from GP etc what type/how diagnosed/etc etc now they say it makes no real difference as they do not feel he has that long. Degeneration seemed fairly rapid in my opinion and is still worsening compared to when I saw him about 3 months ago he used to look at me and would choose to hold my hand and smile and when asked a question could reply yes or no ... I went to visit on sunday last week and things have become so different he looks straight through me his mouth remains open he did not seem to acknowledge my dad (his son) or me at all and his hands just grip the chair then relax in repetitive movements he crosses and uncrosses his legs frequently but did not seem to acknowledge our presence or affection at all. He is no longer eating himself he is being fed pureed food and can only walk supported by two carers and I am completely destroyed by all this I cannot stop crying (god I sound so selfish!!!) I just wish someone could help him he cannot speak he does not seem to communicate whatsoever and is awake but so vacant and I love him so dearly I need to know what I can do to ease his pain I don't know what or how he feels he used to cry someimes when we left but now there is no emotion, no flicker or recognition nothing and this world is so cruel to do this to someone so lovely and adorable and it has completely destroyed me I had nightmares since seeing him just want to be with him all the time to cuddle him and tell him it will be ok but no one seems to know anything the carers at his home are lovely and tell me he is ok but how the hell can he be ok he can't tell us so how on earth do they know!!!!!!!! Can anyone help me understand and advise what I can do to ease his suffering PLEASE?