So this is where I am now! Having cared for my Mum long distance 288 miles away from each other arranging carers to give her medication all her doctors appointment etc. etc. since she was diagnosed with Alzheimers just over four years ago she's 88 years old. I work full time but went up regularly to spend long weekends with her and take her to the memory clinic and any other medical appointments, phoned her every day et. etc. Anyway I noticed earlier this year Mum was declining more falls, constant UTI's and I wasn't happy with the carers. Agreed with brother (who lives 20mins to half hour from Mum) that I would take sabbatical for six months from work in July to care for Mum. Mum was much worse than I thought, I had her assessed by Social Care and the Mental Health care team and to cut a long story short Mum was deemed unsafe (she wanders at night) to remain in her own home, it was agreed that Mum should go into a home. I bought Mum home for Christmas and we had a lovely time and returned my Mum for New Year to my brother as agreed. He also said he would look after Mum for the 10 days holiday that my husband and I had booked starting on Thursday. I have had a dreadful time not because of Mums Alzheimer's but the total lack of support of my brother. He refuses still to acknowledge that Mum wasn't safe, or how unwell she is. I had to put up with him doubting everything I was saying while there and a complete lack of support from him. He even accused the doctors etc. of being wrong! This was the only reason I had to get Social Care involved (Mum will be self funding) as he wouldn't listen to me. Anyway I had looked at homes both local to Mum and me and gave him feedback. my brother refused to even look until a week ago and when he finally did emailed three close to him with no feedback last week. He made it very difficult for me to speak to Mum when she was with him, she was getting distressed and asking for me (according to the Social Worker) and barely a week after we had dropped her off I received a call asking us to pick her up. This is despite the fact that both he and Social Care knew there was no rooms available at the home I had suggested as being best for Mum. I must add that I have been diagnosed with stress and depression which has been caused by my brother. He and Social Care are aware that I'm not well. My husband took a day off of work and we drove the 11 hours there and back on Friday to bring Mum back home with us, she was shaky and confused but seemed so happy to see me. Prior to this I rushed round looking at other homes local to me who had spaces and found one about 20 miles away which I have booked Mum into tomorrow on the understanding that Mum can be transferred to the home nearer to me when they have a space. Mum has been quite happy here in our home but now I don't know what to do should I take her to the home so I can have a holiday and risk her becoming worse? Or should I keep her here with me at home for the next two weeks hoping that a space comes up in the preferred home before I have to go to work? I have thought about keeping her at home but our property is so small and to be honest I feel really unwell at the moment I'm not sure that I can do it. I really only want to do what is best for Mum but I don't know what to do.