Help in bathroom

[maggier]

Hi everyone

My mum will now not have a bath unless someone reminds her. She had a bath one day and couldn't get herself out. We told her to have a bath when one of us was around, but because she tells us all the time she can manage things by herslef, stubbornly went ahead and bathed alone.

Anyway now she has frightened herself so much she will not get in the bath at all. Last Saturday we had a huge row, because I wanted her to have a bath (she was looking decidedly unkept and her hair was all flat and dull. Anyway, she did eventually get in the bath (I was outside the bathroom door, sobbing my heart out because I am 49 years old and have never seen my mum in the bath or with no clothes on)

Then I went in and helped her wash and rinse her hair, She was shouting at me "you're killing me, I am going to die, why are you making me have a bath, is it because you are putting me away!!". but we eventually ended up laughing with each other, she looked like a drowned rat, but once she was out (I nearly killed myself hauling her out of the bath, I was as wet as she was) she looked all clean and her hair was all fluffy and sweet smelling and IO think she felt loads better for having a b ath.

Sorry to be so long winded, but the question I want to ask is, does anyone know if there is any financial help we could get to have a walk in shower put in for mum as I think this would be a lot easier for her and she would probably be able to manage this herself. ( and if not by herself then it would be easier for us to help her as we would not have to lift her at all) Mum lives in a council bungalow and has no savings, just her pension and higher rate attendance allowance.

Any help gratefully appreciated.

Maggie

 

[twink]

bath time

Hi Maggie,

We are moving to a ground floor flat because my husband had alzheimer's and rheumatoid arthritis (he is 55 years old) and I certainly won't be able to get him out of the bath if he gets in it. I have to ring Social Services when we move so I've been told to see if they will put a walk in shower in for him. In fact, I might ring them today and ask what the situation will be. Social Services were going to visit this house so see how they could help in any way but there was a waiting list for an assessment of 56 weeks!!!!!

I will let you know if I get any joy.

Sue

 

[rummy]

Maggie,

While you are waiting for a shower, can you get a non skid mat for the tub, a small tub chair, and a sprayer on a hose that attaches to the tub facet. At least she would at a sitting position and don't forget a hand rail so she has something to hang onto. I'm sure there will be water going here and there but maybe she can manage her own bath for awhile. My Mom has a walk in shower and still my Dad has to plead with her to take one. She never washes her own hair either. I am going over this morning to stick her head in the sink!! Oh, that sounds dreadful doesn't it. I'm also looking for dry shampoo that you brush through their hair. Might help for those times when you just can't get them to wash it.

Good luck,
Debbie

 

[Kayla]

When Mum first had difficulties using the bath, she was able to get a bath seat which fitted over the bath and lowered her gently down. When this got too difficult, she just used a shower spray. You can buy cheap ones which just fit onto the taps or have a proper electric shower fitted which is much safer. Eventually Mum bought a walk-in bath, but I wouldn't recommend one of these because anyone who is disabled might find it hard to close the door properly, resulting in a lot of water on the floor. Also they are hideously expensive. Now Mum is in NH, and we are renting out her house, young families are not keen on the idea of a walk-in bath, so it has become a liability. Mum only had the benefit of it for a couple of years so although it kept her out of a care home for a little longer, it was not a financial sucess. Unfortunately, I don't think there is a market for second-hand, beige walk-in , elecrically powered baths. The walk-in showers are probably a much better idea.

 

[Lynne]

I am going over this morning to stick her head in the sink!! Oh, that sounds dreadful doesn't it.
Debbie

Don't worry Debbie, we all feel like that sometimes, I'm sure! Your secret is safe with us here.

 

[Michael E]

I have found the walk in showers I installed for Monique to be excellent although it took forever to get built and operational.... Getting Monique in and out of a bath was really not easy - emotionally or physically!!!

During the construction time I had a shower attachment on the bath - in fact the mixer taps already had a shower hose outlet.

Monique was happy to step into the bath and either stand up or use a purpose x bath seat - £20 .... In fact she got on very well with this system despite balance and agility problems.... so good that whilst the walk-in purpose built shower is better it has not made as much difference I would have imagined between showering in the bath and walking in......

You can buy a mixer tap with a shower outlet for about £50 and a plumber should be able to install for about £50 as well.... Then you need an attachment for the wall - pretty easy to fit with an electric drill and a couple of rawl plugs or I am sure the plumber would do it all in.. 10 minutes work max...

I know plumbers are like gold dust and charge like angry bulls but for about £100 you can solve the shower problem - still a lot of money but the decrease in 'personal perfume' makes it pretty worth while...

Michael

 

[maggier]

Thanks for all your replies,

Debbi, I know exactly what you mean, when mum was in the bath I was just pouring water over her head with a jug, she was shrieking and shouting and if anyone had heard us they would have thought she was being mnurdered (especially when she shouted "you're killing me") but like you would a child, I just did it quick and tried to get it over with as soon as possible. I gave her a facecloth to put over her eyes. We did both end up laughing, but unlike a 3 year old, I couldn't just pick her up and pop her in the bath, or get her out. and I really can't afford to have a bad back, as I need to go to work.

It's all part of the fun!! (sometimes it's not funny at all though)

Keep on smiling!!!
Happy days!!
Maggie x

 

[pammy14]

Hi

Social services will get the red cross to do a bathing assessment then we got hand rails bath seat etc on loan from the red cross. They told me when my sister cant get upstairs she will refer us to occupational therapist to see about a shower or something down stairs. They are often paid for by council - diability grants.

I find every morning I just tell my sister we are having a bath she always says no but I just encourage her and she gives way sometime scomplaining of course but being incontinent it is necessary.

 

[Margarita]

maggier

That is what happen to my mother & she got suck in the bath 2 time 3rd time my son had to help me to get her out & use scream blue murder when I use to pour water on her head to wash her hair, I have since learn that people with AD & dementia can have a fear of water being poured over there head, so now I tilt mum head back.

I had to get a walk in shower I know you’ve told your social worker but with us in Hammersmith fulham we have to phone the disability apportion unit that is located at our town hall they give us the number then they come around & do an assessment on my mum, it may be quicker for you if you can get there number from the social worker , because your get the social worker comes around then have to wait for someone from the desirability adoption section to come around.

I had to wash down mum for 10 mouths in the hand basin in the bath room , as she would not get in the bath ,she use to knell down on floor to wash her hair yes she screamed , I use to tell her to shut up ,but then I did not understand the fear of the water with people with AD ,she use to hold a towel on her face that got very wet but it keep her quiet. Only wash her hair then ones a week , you could ask social worker for a carer to come to wash your mum while your waiting for your mum shower to be put in , but then would your mum agree with it .

When I went away for a week & mum stayed at home with my teenager during the time we had no shower , I did get a carer in to wash mum in the morning she did not like the idea at first , but I talk her around you do have to put your foot down with them sometime , its hard as I remember the argument that we had that’s so pointless , I ‘m ashamed to say this now , but in those days I use to say to mum if you don’t like the way I am looking after you , you can go in a care home , she use to trun around and say ok then ,she go quiet & then agree with me . I really did not mean it, but it was the only way mum would listen to me in those times.

Now I have a walk in shower & she happily shower away with my help & how has a carer who washer her in the morning 7 days a week.

Things really do get better when you get the walk in shower

 

[Amy]

Hiya Maggier,
We had Occ Therapist in to do an assessment on mum. She organised a bath seat, that was battery operated to raise and lower mum. Sounds as though it is what you need; I could manage mum on her own, and she was in advanced stages ie unable to walk, or understand. Didn't have to pay anything.
Love Helen

 

[McK]

Just some info on shampoos. If you go to Google and put in SAGE PRODUCTS, you will find a Shampoo Cap called Comfort Hair which is a rinse free shampoo cap. Youwarm it up in the microwave; place cap on head and massage the outside of the cap. The cap has the shampoo and conditioner all in one and you don't have to rinse. I found that it doesn't do as good a job as a regular shampoo but for another option, it's fine. The company also has an international site and you can order their products online. Good luck - McK

 

[Margarita]

Amy my OT said that bath seat, battery operated to raise is very heavy to life in & out of bath as other members of the family had to use bath also ,that’s why she said to put in walk in shower

 

[Amy]

The one we had was in two parts - I didn't find it too difficult to manage.
Helen

 

[jan.]

Hi Maggie,

I had the same problems with my dad, so i contacted social services and requested a bath nurse to come in for half an hour, they arranged everything for me and dad has a bath regularly now. It retains his dignity and relieves me of the worry of whether he`s bathing himself properly. It`s worth the small amount they charge, and dad enjoys seeing someone different to have a chat with. Well worth considering?!?!?

Good luck with it.

Love Jan. x

 

[Lynne]

McK, I Googled "Sage Products" but all I got was computer software sites. Could you post the website address please? Thanks

 

[Brucie]

Try http://www.sageproducts.com/products/hair.asp

 

[Lynne]

Thanks Bruce

 

[Margarita]

Bruce I went to that link, what a good idea thanks must get some for mum am left wondering I could give use it