Dear 2jays,
Isn't it wonderful to have all these people who just want us to be well? I'm another person, not virtual at all, but very real, just sending your warmth, comfort, peace and a gentle day today and tomorrow.
Well done for phoning the Samaratans. A good lesson for all of us here. Feeling alone and isolated is NOT the way out, reaching out to us on the forum and to Samaratans or anyone else IS the way forward. You have just proved it here, and shown me NOT to choose misery and isolation over warmth, being indoors, communicating.
Have you thought of your expression of choice recently? "All you need is a backbone, a wishbone and a funny bone.....?" I thought that so simple and profound. When I first read it I made myself a meditation card with a picture of a backbone (a nice strong spine to stand up when things are tough, and be flexible when flexibility is required); a wishbone to keep my hopes up, my creative juices flowing, and staying in touch with me; and a funny bone when the first two are insufficient, and all that is left is to see it isn't that serious at all.
I looked up the funny bone. It isn't funny at all when we hit it. Painful actually. It isn't a bone at all, but the ulner nerve. So what is funny to some, can be painful to others. Emotional pain and physical pain are reactions to being 'hit in the wrong place'.
I'm wandering, but hope you can sense that I am reaching out to you. You did the right thing in contacting us and Samaratans, in going indoors. Now release the emotional aches and pains, and listen within........ peace is always just under the surface.
I have spent an hour and a half just relaxing my body systematically, and boy oh boy am I relaxed.
Blessings, 2jays, and here is to speedy resolution of that which troubles you. with love BE