1. witsend~1

    witsend~1 Registered User

    Jul 16, 2014
    31
    North Lincolnshire
    Hello, guess what, your dad is still here
    Hello, guess what, there's nothing to fear.
    He might get befuddled, he might loose the thread
    He can't always remember, it's in there somewhere, deep in his head!
    Please don't just ignore us, a call would be nice
    an offer of help would doubly suffice.
    He sometimes asks me where you all are? Are they out playing?
    I lie, 'they're in the back yard'
    You stopped buying him presents, that was so hard, all that he gets is the obligatory card.
    I can't help but wonder where the invisibles are.
    He's not getting younger, he will never get better, so why don't you sit down and write him a letter.
    Tell him you love him, tell him you care.
    I promise he'll read it,read it and read it all over again.
    I know that your busy and have your own lives, families and work but please don't ignore us and visit our lives.x
     
  2. irismary

    irismary Registered User

    Feb 7, 2015
    499
    West Midlands
    So well put - little things like a phone call or a visit mean so much don't they. I do think its fear sometimes.
    Best wishes
     
  3. Allypally67

    Allypally67 Registered User

    Feb 20, 2016
    21
    West Sussex
    Oh Witsend!
    You brought tears to my eyes :( . I hope they read this and write that letter!
    Big (((hugs))) to you and OH!
    Allypally x
     
  4. Aisling

    Aisling Registered User

    Dec 5, 2015
    1,807
    Ireland
    Hi Witsend,

    That is brilliant. Well done.

    People say;

    He doesn't know me anymore.

    I say but you know him.


    People are afraid;

    I say it is about time to handle your fear!

    " there is nothing to fear" ( Witsend )

    People say ;

    I don't know what I can do to help

    I say;

    Ask me and I will tell you.

    People say;

    What will the neighbours think?

    I say that is their problem, not mine.

    Sending support,

    Aisling
     
  5. Gwendy1

    Gwendy1 Registered User

    Feb 9, 2016
    414
    Glasgow
    That is so moving. I know what u mean by the re/reading of cards and letters- they mean soooo much to dad. .. U have written a truly beautiful and thought-provoking piece. Thank you. X
     
  6. Loopiloo

    Loopiloo Registered User

    May 10, 2010
    6,119
    Female
    Scotland
    Oh Witsend, how deeply moving, sad and it brought tears to my eyes also. Many of us on TP will identify with all that you wrote. Those we love suffering this awful disease are still who they were, somewhere deep inside but lost in a fog. Sometimes it briefly clears, we catch a glimpse, then gone again. Sad, sad, sad. For them, for us.

    Loo xx
     
  7. witsend~1

    witsend~1 Registered User

    Jul 16, 2014
    31
    North Lincolnshire
    Nothing to fear

    I am so pleased that you liked my little verse and your comments are very welcome. I would love the verse to 'go viral' and maybe jangle a few nerves, not just those close to us, but those that directly impact on our loved ones lives and those of their carers, the policy makers, the decision makers, the media in all its various forms.
    Why are there no story lines on the soaps? Are they blind? Do they not think AZ affects them or their viewers? My Pete wouldn't dream of watching them before AZ, but now he does and rarely misses one. He can't follow the stories, but it does entertain him in his own special way. Tell it how it is, not just the bad times but the funny times as well but most of all the deep sense of loss of the person they once were....oh I could go on. I started to keep a record when he started to act strangely back in 2012 to try and 'get my head' round it. It's now 88 pages long, single spaced. My thoughts, my laughter,my frustration,my fears, my love,my hate (yes there are days!) My loves lost pride, his memory and his dreams!
    God Bless All xx
     
  8. Otiruz

    Otiruz Registered User

    Nov 28, 2015
    255
    Kent
    How beautiful and how sad Witsend~1.
    Kindness, reaching out, making contact, keeping in touch, offering to help, picking up the phone, popping in, making an effort - for some people these things become impossible when it comes to a relative or friend with a form of dementia. Easier to be busy, have a lot on, call next week, don't know what to say, will he/she recognise me?
    Emerdale currently has a storyline with the vicar, who has youngish children having been diagnosed - I hope it nudges people who should 'be' there for PWD and their carers and serves to educate.
     
  9. jknight

    jknight Registered User

    Oct 23, 2015
    786
    Hampshire
    Witsend, would you mind your poem being copied to Facebook? I think it's wonderful and deserves a wider audience x
     
  10. witsend~1

    witsend~1 Registered User

    Jul 16, 2014
    31
    North Lincolnshire
    Please feel free...the more the merrier . Thankyou
     

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