Hello!

Pudster

Registered User
Jul 29, 2013
24
0
Braintree
I have quickly read a few of the many posts and decided to just get on with it and write! I think that this will be a good place for me to find out more and share experiences. After a year of tests etc my husband was diagnosed with 'early stage dementia, probable AZ ' in May this year. He has not been prescribed any medication and, unlike other posts, I don't have a clue what stage he is? He is very forgetful regarding daily plans etc, though retired and doesn't have a big social calendar. I have noticed he becomes anxious when we break familiar routines, for example a recent short break to a very familiar place. He will frequently repeat questions and look for reassurance about where his keys, wallet, mobile phone are...or will frantically pat pockets to reassure himself where they are. He has written to DVLA and seems to pin everything on whether he will be able to drive or not. He is still able to walk to local shops, though now writes a list for even one or two items. I first became aware of 'something' in 2009, but at that time did not understand why, I was just looking out for him a bit more than usual. He has an appointment with the memory clinic in Oct but we are not sure what to expect, though I know this will raise anxiety a notch or two as the appointment nears.
Within three days of my husbands diagnosis, my mother was diagnosed with vascular dementia. We saw a rapid decline in her logic and increase in random conversations but were all (including her GP) stunned with the diagnosis, she has breast cancer which we thought had spread. Unfortunately, despite obtaining cleaning and gardening services, she began to wander, putting herself at too greater risk. She went into a CH, which has just been made permanent. On the positive, she has really improved since being there is responding well to having more stimulation. Her humour has re-emerged and she is a popular person at the CH. She is realistic about the move and weighing up the pros and cons, which at this point in time is pretty balanced.
I recognise that this may be a more positive time on our journey and am grateful that it is here at the moment!
Anyway hello and I look forward to reading more, getting to know you and sharing good and not so good times and learning how to use this forum! :)
 

60's child

Registered User
Apr 23, 2013
588
0
suffolk
Hi Pudster
Welcome to the forum. You have certainly been landed with a lot of worry recently. Good to hear that your Mum has settled well in the CH. Must be a relief for you. I care for my Mum with alzheimers. She is always losing things and "patting " herself down to find keys etc as you describe your husband doing. When you attend the memory clinic they will probably do a memory test and just find out how he is doing. Do you know why he is not on any medication? I would be inclined to write down any questions you both have before you go. My Mum still attends memory clinics but not much happens really. Looking forward to seeing you "out and about" on the forum. It is a very supportive place.
 
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Grannie G

Volunteer Moderator
Apr 3, 2006
81,798
0
Kent
Hello Pudster

Well you have been thrown into the deep end. I am very sorry.

I`m glad you have found Talking Point. It has been a mine of support and information to so many of us .

I wouldn`t worry too much about what stage of dementia your husband is at. They are only a rough guide and many overlap because there are so many other factors to consider, age, general well being, other medication and the rate of progression…..all different in so many people.

I would ask your husband`s doctor why he is not being prescribed medication. It doesn`t work for everyone but is certainly worth trying.
 

Pudster

Registered User
Jul 29, 2013
24
0
Braintree
Thank you for your replies. I feel quite tearful at the moment, probably overwhelmed, as I have found a place to let out how I feel and find support without having to explain too much...you get it! Re reading my message of last night, I can see how I have 'wrapped up' my thoughts and feelings, so a relief to let it go a bit.
I will look into the medication, thanks
 

Butter

Registered User
Jan 19, 2012
6,737
0
NeverNeverLand
You are very much not alone here - I hope you find the wealth of sense and experience and togetherness that I have done.

Many of us are trying to keep an eye out for more than one person - and of course trying to keep an eye out for ourselves too. Otherwise we are no use to anyone.

I wish you luck and courage!