Hello

[whatsgoingon]

Im new And dont know where to start, as i dont know what going on, really I dont...Ive forgotten where I puit Important things, Ive forgotten sometimes my wifes name, Ive put muilk in cooker, Ive put toast under grill and nearly set light 5 times past month Im told, Now shes bought a Toaster..Ive stood at my wardrobe and got very confused as what to wear , i.e a choice of 3 t-shirts and Im confused??? Ive written most of this down as Ive gone along..

My wife has said Ive done other things and she might have to see Dr, Ive told her not to bother its nothing,I really dont need this confusion, as Im Bi-lateral profoundly deaf, balance problem because balance nerve was cut during an operation, Ive had abcess on the brain, I cant remember when though. so i use electric scooter to get about, I used to use a stick, but some idiots of youths thought I was drunk and beat me up hmm long time ago, I have a diary with most things written down, my bank card details are kept by my wife as I cant remember them even though Ive had them many Years. Sometimes i sit here at keyboard and go into a 5 minute stare at keys wondering what the hell Im doing here, Ive put bread under grill and nearly set light to kitchen phew..

Ive put kettle on draining board without realising, and left it Im waitng for it to boil, the plug socket for kettle is otherside of kitchen..Ive put jam down bottom cupboard when its been in top cupboard many years, we have cooker opposite washing machine, Ive put clothes into cooker for washing, luckily my wife didnt know as I accidently found them before she did..

Oh God I REALLY AM Confused I cant remember where I put my keys, thats over a month go now, You know I put them somewhere safe?
so so so many things, worst was Saturday as Ive got in diary.

"Went to sons with wife to babysit grandchildren, got there I remembered grandaughters name but coudnt remember grandsons name, im felt like crying" Then the magic word came up, my son wrote ADAM wants you to read to him tonight when hes in bed..That triggered his name to me, god that was so sad...

Well Im stopping right there, please please dont say let wife go to drs. I DONT WANT TO....Im Ok for now..

Oh And Im 60 dont say its age related please lol

 

[Grannie G]

..Im Ok for now

You don`t sound OK to me and if I was your wife I`d be going to the doctor`s without you knowing. Actually that`s what I did when I was worried about my husband in case something could be done to help him, and the sooner the better.
At 60 no one will say anything is age related.
It just might not be what you fear and if you waste time you might live to regret it. Please have a rethink. xx

 

[TinaT]

Well 'Whatsgoingon'

If you don't go to the doctor then chances are it will get worse. If you do go to the doctor chances are at this stage of the game he can prescribe some medication which will at least slow things down for you.

Is this something you can't face and so sweep it under the carpet? That is very understandable as no one likes to be given bad news. But then you will have to live with the uncertainty that whatever it is could have been made a little better. From the prompts the family are giving you it would seem that whatever it is, it is seriously impinging on your present life.

The choice is yours my friend.

xxTinaT

 

[lin1]

Hello Whatsgoingon

You need to go to your gp, and deep down you know it dont you.

Your wife and family must be out of their minds with worry,

If not for your sake go to gp for you wifes sake

if your symptoms are caused by Dementia then your wife is going to need help at some stage and plans to be made

WHAT IF IT'S NOT DEMENTIA,BUT SOME OTHER TREATABLE ILLNESS

 

[PostTenebrasLux]

Hello What'sgoingon,

Welcome to Talking Point.
We are here to support you the best we can.
You have realised you are facing a major change in your life and you are probably just trying to face up to the facts in your own time.
It is a tremendous first step you have taken writing to us. It is often the first step that counts.
We are all encouraging you, when you feel ready, but soon, to make an appointment with your GP.
You might prefer to go for the first visit on your own, to get a confirmation of what you already suspect. Once you have had a day or two to digest the GP meeting, then you could book a return visit, that time with your wife who deserves to be included in your situation so that she may support and help you the best she can - you will need it and she needs to understand what kind of needs you will require.
Best wishes for courage and strength in coming to terms with this disease. It is difficult and hard and we all try the best we can to encourage you.
Martina

 

[whatsgoingon]

yes

Hello Whatsgoingon

You need to go to your gp, and deep down you know it dont you.

Your wife and family must be out of their minds with worry,

If not for your sake go to gp for you wifes sake

if your symptoms are caused by Dementia then your wife is going to need help at some stage and plans to be made

WHAT IF IT'S NOT DEMENTIA,BUT SOME OTHER TREATABLE ILLNESS

Yes deep down I do realise, but I dont want to know, if that makes sense to you? yet no day is the same, sometimes I can have a good day and only have the odd forget here and there.. As it is I think its just me and my wife that know whats happening, unless she has told my sons as they do look at me sometimes in a confused manner.

Thanks for your support...

 

[whatsgoingon]

step

Hello What'sgoingon,

Welcome to Talking Point.
We are here to support you the best we can.
You have realised you are facing a major change in your life and you are probably just trying to face up to the facts in your own time.
It is a tremendous first step you have taken writing to us. It is often the first step that counts.
We are all encouraging you, when you feel ready, but soon, to make an appointment with your GP.
You might prefer to go for the first visit on your own, to get a confirmation of what you already suspect. Once you have had a day or two to digest the GP meeting, then you could book a return visit, that time with your wife who deserves to be included in your situation so that she may support and help you the best she can - you will need it and she needs to understand what kind of needs you will require.
Best wishes for courage and strength in coming to terms with this disease. It is difficult and hard and we all try the best we can to encourage you.
Martina

(It is a tremendous first step you have taken writing to us. It is often the first step that counts)

Yes it took some doing to join and write in forum as Ive been looking in from outside for a long time now, then going off thinking nah Im ok.....

Am I making sense ?

Thanks for support from all on this forum..

 

[lin1]

Yes deep down I do realise, but I dont want to know, if that makes sense to you? l

Yes It does make sense. You are worried to say the least.

you have been reading post's here for a while and some of them lets face it are pretty scary.

If you do have dementia
Not getting a diagnosis will not make it go away.
If you do have dementia and get a diagnosis, that opens the doors to a wide range of help, support for you AND YOUR WIFE,and the possibility of medication to slow it's progress down.

But what if it's not dementia, what if it's something that can cause these symptoms and with some treatment for it you can be back to your old self ? or at the very least get no worse.

I also believe you ARE by coming here getting ready to go to your doc, yes it's scary. but lets face it your scared now ain't you.

I also want to REASSURE YOU that their IS LIFE after a diagnosis of dementia, my mum had many good yrs after wards in time mum was put on Ebixa a drug that can help, and it was and still is a great help.

BUT im hoping that your symptoms are being caused by something else that's easily treated.

 

[whatsgoingon]

Yes It does make sense. You are worried to say the least.

you have been reading post's here for a while and some of them lets face it are pretty scary.

If you do have dementia
Not getting a diagnosis will not make it go away.
If you do have dementia and get a diagnosis, that opens the doors to a wide range of help, support for you AND YOUR WIFE,and the possibility of medication to slow it's progress down.

But what if it's not dementia, what if it's something that can cause these symptoms and with some treatment for it you can be back to your old self ? or at the very least get no worse.

I also believe you ARE by coming here getting ready to go to your doc, yes it's scary. but lets face it your scared now ain't you.

I also want to REASSURE YOU that their IS LIFE after a diagnosis of dementia, my mum had many good yrs after wards in time mum was put on Ebixa a drug that can help, and it was and still is a great help.

BUT im hoping that your symptoms are being caused by something else that's easily treated.

(BUT im hoping that your symptoms are being caused by something else that's easily treated..) What else is possible ??

I had op 3months ago, there abouts, Cochlear Implant that isnt going well at moment, I had every test available
full blood count, water tests, but even after that op i went back in 1 week later with Menigitis B pheeew...

thanks for your help it does help believe you me....

 

[whatsgoingon]

Sorry :-(

I havent been on past few days, i couldnt remember name of this web site, sad isnt it...I just kept typing all sorts til my mind suddenly saw something and triggered it off, and here I am.

Well today has been bad, I went to Hospital for CT Scan, A place Ive been to many times im told, my wife dropped me off with my electric scooter, and I ended up getting lost, I didnt ask, I just kept going and looking til I found place, I had paper with name on it, saying CT Scan.

Well that was over I went early my wife says 8.20 am, Then I got mobile out to send her text as Im Deaf, she wasnt with me as she had to do something else.. but I couldnt remember how to use my mobile :-(

I tried and tried and tried and tried forever and ever, in the end I just couldnt remember how to use it, I went to reception desk near exit and asked if they could find my wifes name and call her and tell her Im ready to be picked up. I felt so embarrassed, my excuse to reception was I think my mobile is playing up.

Many minor things happened today, I dont know where I put my mug after washing it up after cup of tea :-(

I had tea and toast this morning, my wife told me I forgot to eat my toast, I said noo I just didnt want it, Im fibbing to cover, I cant keep this up. I think I want her to go to Dr'S for me, Because Im afraid myself.

Then sometimes I feel ok And forget about it...I think my wife WILL be going soon to Dr'S, As something happened today, that I laughed, i cant remember what,I said its funny, she said no its not funny at all..:-(

Is there any type of small test I can do online or something.YES Im scared.

CJ

 

[whatsgoingon]

No Choice

I give up, its getting too much for me, so Im going to try and be brave and see dr Monday......

Lets do a tiny bit of weeding in small patch of garden,
"Lets cut down my TWO lovely Rose bushes" Why did i do that!!! I dont know, wife went out to get couple cuttings for vase and found what I had done......

long time Ive had them :-(

Im need of anger management help now....

Thanks everyone...

 

[whatsgoingon]

Hmmm

I look for outstretched hand...and get nothing, cant be good, adios friends and thanks at start anyway...

 

[sharina]

Worried

Please don't worry.It achieves nothing.We have to confront fears and deal with them.I know its hard and scary .In your head you are acting out the worse case scenario so can things be any worse?

There are so many types of dementias and so many drugs.New ideas are coming through all the time.Things can be done to slow the progress of the disease,if that is what is the problem.My mum had vascular dementia and I feel that if we had realised she had heart failure,the progress of the disease would have been slowed by heart failure drugs.

Please get a complete check up because there could be physical issues which need to be medicated.This could help the memory issues.It might be low thyroxin causing physical problems and then memory issues. etc.

You need a thorough assessment from a memory clinic and a complete blood screen and health check.Dont let your GP fob you off with treatment for depression.

You could download the mini mental examination and check your score.eg.Can you take 7 away from a hundred until you get down to nothing?

Your wife needs you to be strong and get help.If it is the worse case then you need to thing about directives for medical treatment or a living will.You need to think about an enduring power of attorney.These things need to be done whilst you have the capability.

Don't hide away in the cupboard from the beast.Go out and fight it!

 

[Izzy]

Hi. My husband forgets lots of things and does stuff like you do. He has been on medication for 9 years almost and I think it has slowed things down. We have had to adjust our lives but he still enjoys a full life - just a different one. Sorry you are so sad and angry but I can understand why. Please go and see if you can get some medication to help - it's worth it. Take care. Izzy x

 

[whatsgoingon]

Tried

Please don't worry.It achieves nothing.We have to confront fears and deal with them.I know its hard and scary .In your head you are acting out the worse case scenario so can things be any worse?

There are so many types of dementias and so many drugs.New ideas are coming through all the time.Things can be done to slow the progress of the disease,if that is what is the problem.My mum had vascular dementia and I feel that if we had realised she had heart failure,the progress of the disease would have been slowed by heart failure drugs.

Please get a complete check up because there could be physical issues which need to be medicated.This could help the memory issues.It might be low thyroxin causing physical problems and then memory issues. etc.

You need a thorough assessment from a memory clinic and a complete blood screen and health check.Dont let your GP fob you off with treatment for depression.

You could download the mini mental examination and check your score.eg.Can you take 7 away from a hundred until you get down to nothing?

Your wife needs you to be strong and get help.If it is the worse case then you need to thing about directives for medical treatment or a living will.You need to think about an enduring power of attorney.These things need to be done whilst you have the capability.

Don't hide away in the cupboard from the beast.Go out and fight it!

And No I cant count backwards Ive tried many times, unreal!!
I have had a heart attack on operating table Opeartion was cancelled..Im on a pill a day for to slow heart beat down...

I also have D.V.T Thrombosis. hardened Calf Muscles that hurt a lot, and the rest Profoundly Deaf..so they have my history of health and yes you are right Its NOT NOT Depression...

But thanks its good for me to talk about it, Im writing things down so I dont forget..My son came to see me today, with Grandkids, Im saying what you doing here, hes come a long way to see me, He said I text and told you this morning, I FORGOT, its fathers day 2morrow thats why he came...Its rediculous..such silly silly things...

 

[whatsgoingon]

thanks

Hi. My husband forgets lots of things and does stuff like you do. He has been on medication for 9 years almost and I think it has slowed things down. We have had to adjust our lives but he still enjoys a full life - just a different one. Sorry you are so sad and angry but I can understand why. Please go and see if you can get some medication to help - it's worth it. Take care. Izzy x

Thanks Izzy

I just feel need to talk, and blimey your so right, my ANGER isnt nice Im told, Im blaming others, like say I PUT SOMETHING IN WRONG PLACE, or cant remember where I put things, I blame others.....

ALSO I need to know if tiredness comes into this As Im getting so so so tired, I went to bed about 9pm last night, all written down what Im putting, got up at 9.30am, back in bed at mid-day woke up at 4pm...Im sleeping strange times past few mothns..

Thanks again Izzy

 

[nicoise]

Meningitis B?

Hi Whatsgoingon

Sorry to hear about your problems - reading through your posts I see that one of your health problems included recently suffering from meningitis B:

I had op 3months ago, there abouts, Cochlear Implant that isnt going well at moment, I had every test available
full blood count, water tests, but even after that op i went back in 1 week later with Menigitis B pheeew...

Memory impairment can be one of the many after-effects of Meningitis B - and sometimes it's temporary rather than permanent, but can take many months to resolve. It is a very serious infection which can take a long time to recover from, and obviously as it involves your brain its possible that your problems stem from that...

Try reading up on the after-effects - you might find that some of your other problems (anger/tiredness etc) could be part of the recovery process - this link is from the Meningitis Research Foundation's website:

http://www.meningitis.org/disease-info/after-effects

Try mentioning it to your Doctor - I don't know quite how long you've been struggling with memory issues, it may be that you noticed before you became unwell. If you read other posts on this site, infection often seems to make memory problems worse - but not always permanently it seems.

Good luck!

 

[strawberrywhip]

Family are everything!

Hello there,
I was so impressed by your courage, and just wanted to say that I am sure now you have taken the plunge and decided to go to the Doctor, whatever your diagnosis is, it will really help your family as well to plan for the future and support you in the best way they can.
It was a huge relief when MIL had her diagnosis because we all started to understand what we were dealing with..and there is a lot of support out there for all of you, just need to let your family in and remember they need support too.
Mum is developing memory problems and I am now much more prepared...there are so many simple things that can make life easier .. Digital clocks with date and time on..white boards, diaries etc etc..just need to develop strategies that will help you.
Thank you so much for taking the time to post and share the journey that so many of us are on.

 

[sharina]

Worried

I hope you are ok and had further help from yor GP.please do insist on a memory clinic assessment.

I think its to prepare and think of your family. Have you got a lasting power of attorney (www.publicguardian.gov.uk/forms/making-an-LPA)whilst you still know what you own and relevant benefiaries. Please also write a living will for medical treatment In the worse case scenario do you want to be tube fed? Do you want that decision to be left to the family or do you want to make it now?Having gone through it all I wish that my mother had a living will.I had to make decisions which were somewhat scarring .Have you written a will.Its just good to get your affairs in order.Its kinder for the family.

By focusing on these practicalities maybe it will help occupy you and take your mind of the day to day worry.Everyone on the site will be here for you.

I will say a prayer for you and hope you find inner peace and strength.

 

[elaine n]

Never Ever Ever feel embarrased! Just find out what the problem is. My husband has been in denial for years and in the end I had to resort to devious means to get him diagnosed. The very fact that you're here on the forum shows that you're ready to face facts and then accept help from the medics and all of us. We'll alwayays be here for you lol xxxxxxxxxxx