Hello

[Maggiestu]

Hi..I'm 53 and have just been told I have small vessel disease of the brain..my short term memory has been badly effected as has my balance..I've a appt with specialist and I'm worried about the outcome

 

[Shedrech]

hello @Maggiestu
a warm welcome to TP
at this worrying time for you, I'm glad you have come across this wonderfully supportive community so that you can join us and share your experiences - it really helps to get off your chest anything that's bothering you and have the members here offer their thoughts and sympathy
there are folk here who themselves have a diagnosis and also people such as myself who care for someone, in my case my dad - so although we're not professionals or medics, we do collectively have a lot of knowledge and understanding
I really hope you get a chance to talk through all your worries with your consultant - might it help to have a notebook (or use your mobile/tablet) and jot down anything that pops into your head in the next few days so that you can ask all your questions
now you've found TP, pop in anytime, ask anything
best wishes

 

[Maggiestu]

hello @Maggiestu
a warm welcome to TP
at this worrying time for you, I'm glad you have come across this wonderfully supportive community so that you can join us and share your experiences - it really helps to get off your chest anything that's bothering you and have the members here offer their thoughts and sympathy
there are folk here who themselves have a diagnosis and also people such as myself who care for someone, in my case my dad - so although we're not professionals or medics, we do collectively have a lot of knowledge and understanding
I really hope you get a chance to talk through all your worries with your consultant - might it help to have a notebook (or use your mobile/tablet) and jot down anything that pops into your head in the next few days so that you can ask all your questions
now you've found TP, pop in anytime, ask anything
best wishes

 

[Maggiestu]

Thanks so much..im so worried right now..I think it's the not knowing what's coming..although the research myself and my eldest daughter have done has all said the same thing..dementia..i know I've changed a lot in the last yr or so..forgetting conversations ect..falling over..my daughter was already doing a lot for me as I have other health issues and I'm afraid it is all to much for her..I feel I should be making plans ect to save her from worrie..the doc has already told her it's a good idea for her to attend all my apptm as I'm somtimes finding it hard to relate what's been said..I feel like such a burden already xx

 

[Shedrech]

hi @Maggiestu
it's great that you have such a grand daughter supporting you - as the daughter of one parent who had a stroke and was cared for by the other parent who later was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, please beleieve that your daughter will not ever see you as a burden - let her help you, it will be a relief and joy to her to know that she has your trust and respect
though, I won't fib, there have been some challenging times with my dad - but some measures he put in place have made supporting him less awkward at times - so I do recommend that you gradually organise Powers of Attorney and make sure your will is as you want it - let your children know all the ins and outs of your finances, not so they take control, to know how you run your life so that they understand and can step in if you ask - and have that tricky conversation of how you want to be looked after - sorry to be blunt, but I am so glad my dad told me how he felt about the ending of his life as my mind is at peace knowing what he would choose for himself
don't ask them to make promises about how they will care for you; tell them what you would like ideally and then say you trust them to make the best choice for you in the circumstances you all face at any given time - that way you all know the score
none of us know what is around the corner, so nothing I've suggested wouldn't apply to anyone with assets eg savings, a house, and with children who want to help - we all need to think of getting older and maybe needing support at times
I get what you mean about the not knowing - I had a bout with cancer and the worst time was between tests and diagnosis as I just didn't know what to think - once I knew, I could deal with the subsequent medical stuff and get on with living with a few changes in my life
maybe don't research too much, though I appreciate being prepared can take some of the stress away - you are still the woman you were yesterday, and it's unlikely there will be drastic changes today or tomorrow, so take time to breath and enjoy your children's company
keep posting here to share your worries and triumphs - might it help your daughter too; members are annonymous so she won't necessarily spot you amongst other new members
apologies if I have written anything out of line
let us know how you get on
best wishes