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Hello, yes, I'm the daughter

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
370
Ah I think the photo heart and message is a lovely touch, how nice :) ha ha it might surprise you in that he didn’t need cajoling , here’s hoping . Hope you don’t have to wait too long for the next call and to get things sorted.
Well the home did tell me he is settled at the moment. I hope it stays that way.
 

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
370
Aw that sounds lovely x
Hope the council sort out finances soon x
It seems to be rumbling on slowly, I got a call this week from them explaining that they will do dad's needs assessment. The lady who called also informed me of the bands of payment and even the highest band isn't going to meet the current rate so we may have to consider other options, but the home did say they would negotiate.

She also told me that she is a big fan of the home dad is in. We were clearly very lucky to get dad in there!
 

annielou

Registered User
Sep 27, 2019
1,445
Yorkshire
It seems to be rumbling on slowly, I got a call this week from them explaining that they will do dad's needs assessment. The lady who called also informed me of the bands of payment and even the highest band isn't going to meet the current rate so we may have to consider other options, but the home did say they would negotiate.

She also told me that she is a big fan of the home dad is in. We were clearly very lucky to get dad in there!
Fingers crossed 🤞 the home and SS can negotiate a rate so he can stay. Maybe have a look for a few others in case they can't and then see if can mention them to same person and see if she's a fan of any of those too. x
 

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
370
Fingers crossed 🤞 the home and SS can negotiate a rate so he can stay. Maybe have a look for a few others in case they can't and then see if can mention them to same person and see if she's a fan of any of those too. x
That's great thinking! I have had a look online at the homes with EMI units in the area as if he's going to move I'd ideally like it to be to one which can be a long term option. Will be interested to see how they assess his needs and where they think he's at in terms of how complex they are.
 

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
370
No more news from the council or anyone but just thought I'd pop in to say the home posted some photos on Facebook and Dad was colouring one of the books I sent. His hair looks very long but had been neatly combed. I remain very grateful for their care.
 

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
370
Call from Dad's home this morning. Dad 'escaped'. Got out through the front door, through the keypad somehow. He didn't go far enough for his tracker to alert me but for some reason went to a different care home just up the road. Both homes called the police and they matched up and he was safely returned.

Dad told the other home he had gone out to do some shopping.

I spoke to him but didn't mention the escapades and he told me he'd been out for a walk earlier 'to keep fit' but the weather was horrible so they had gone into a pub, and although no beer had been found yet, he thought the locals were enjoying their company.
Anyway he did have a cup of tea and he reminded me we should be grateful for it as it's wartime, after all. He's going to get rid of his car, it's too expensive to keep and he's hardly using it anyway, and he needs the space really.

I called the home again and relayed this info, and they told me that he is often this confused. He's also started asking for his wife and saying she is meeting him there and then they will be going home. And I am switching between daughter and sister.

Despite all of this he doesn't seem to be unhappy most of the time, just confused. But I find it really sad, of course.
 

Woo2

Registered User
Apr 30, 2019
2,300
South East
What a relief he wandered in to another home , that must of been a worry for all , glad he got back ok . Good to hear he isn’t unhappy , that must be a slight positive .
 

annielou

Registered User
Sep 27, 2019
1,445
Yorkshire
The confusion is so sad to see and hear isn’t it, maybe slightly easier if not upsetting them but very hard and sad. I’m so glad he went to another home who know what to do, What a shock he managed to get out. Glad he is ok 🤗
 

Sarasa

Registered User
Apr 13, 2018
1,521
So glad your dad ended up somewhere safe and not an actual pub @imthedaughter , though I guess he hadn't any money on him. My mum managed to get as far as the home's car park in her bid to escape last year. I'm not sure if she could have got out, but she was spotted and enticed back in. It's a worry, but I guess the home will be on the look out for any further attempts.
 

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
370
Thanks for the replies @Sarasa @annielou @Woo2

I am indeed glad he didn't come to any harm. I don't know why he went to the other home but maybe it looked like the his one!

As he may get up at any time, they are checking on him once an hour every hour during the night and trying to ensure there is someone around the lobby/dining area early in the morning - but they have to hope no one tries to get up on their own and falls over, or something else... I expect they will also at the very least change the door code.

@annielou apparently dad has a loop going on his car, so it's not just your mum. Dad has to find his car, get rid of his car, etc... and now his wife - meet up with, find or whatever.
 

Susan11

Registered User
Nov 18, 2018
2,319
Thanks for the replies @Sarasa @annielou @Woo2

I am indeed glad he didn't come to any harm. I don't know why he went to the other home but maybe it looked like the his one!

As he may get up at any time, they are checking on him once an hour every hour during the night and trying to ensure there is someone around the lobby/dining area early in the morning - but they have to hope no one tries to get up on their own and falls over, or something else... I expect they will also at the very least change the door code.

@annielou apparently dad has a loop going on his car, so it's not just your mum. Dad has to find his car, get rid of his car, etc... and now his wife - meet up with, find or whatever.
Mum has a sensor mat by her bed. If she gets up during the night an alarm goes off in the office and they can go straight to her to check she's ok. I would think the care home could do something similar for your Dad.
 

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
370
Mum has a sensor mat by her bed. If she gets up during the night an alarm goes off in the office and they can go straight to her to check she's ok. I would think the care home could do something similar for your Dad.
That's a good point, thank you!
 

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
370
Remarkable news today.

A email from social services. Dad's placement funding has been approved.

Just like that.

He's been given the highest level of funding too so whatever was in his care report must have merited it.

Until next year, we don't have to worry about where dad can afford to live.

We have other things to worry about but that's for another day.

I'm gagged. I cannot believe there wasn't some kind of interrogation. Obviously I sent all the evidence and pushed my case but I still can't quite believe it.
 

imthedaughter

Registered User
Apr 3, 2019
370
This is the point where I discovered DWP had stopped paying his pension - I have now sorted it out and they will write to me with the details of payments etc. Phew!