Hello - I'm new to Talking Point


Registered User
Jun 17, 2008

My father was diagnosed with Alzheimers about 2 years ago. He is 86 and his main carer is my Mother who is 83. I am his daughter, I am retired and live close by and help every day. He also has day care coming in every day to help him get up and have a shower etc. They also have a home help coming in twice a week.

He has had radiotherapy and chemotherapy for cancer earlier in this year and was in hospital for about 8 weeks (5 of these in Inverness 110 miles away). The cancer has been shrunk and may not affect him again for a number of years. This experiences has made his Alzhemers much worse.

The Doctors, the NHS and Local Social Services have all been very helpful.

I know my father is old - (but dispite everything is reasonably fit - he cycled up to his early 80s) - and we are getting help but I feel very depressed at times wondering if I have dementia because my memory is not the best.

Then I count my blessings - a supportive husband, two children who have each have given me a lovely grandson. I do volunary work, play lawn green bowls and bridge. Live is not so bad.
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Registered User
Jun 11, 2008
Welcome Farnorth.
Coincidence cos my dad is 86 with Alz and physically fit and was cared for by my disabled 83 year old mother (she died a couple of weeks ago) so now I have moved in with him to be his full time carer and trying to think I am doing it for the right reasons even though I have had to give up my full time job. I am on my own with him but get a little time off occassionally when my brother takes him out.
Don't worry about your memory going a bit....par for the course of being a human being....
Am reading a book called 'The Selfish Pig's Guide to Caring' (get it from Amazon) and its funny and very helpful. It helps to see the funny side of things.
Keep your chin up. And its good to talk!


Registered User
Mar 27, 2008
Hello Farnorth

I hope you find some friendship and solace using Talking Point.

but I feel very depressed at times wondering if I have dementia because my memory is not the best.
If this worry is causing you to be depressed then would you consider talking to your GP about your worries. It is highly possible that you are worrying for nothing and then you can put it behind you and use the energy for better things.

Love Helen


Registered User
Oct 15, 2005
Welcome to TP Farnorth.

Glad you've found us.This is such a great site for advice, help or just a place to let off steam. We all know the feelings of isolation and depression.
Take care.

PS. Stress makes you forgetful, and boy are we a stressed bunch on the whole!:eek:


Registered User
Aug 29, 2006
SW Scotland
Hi Farnorth, welcome to TP.

My goodness, you are far north, aren't you? I think you must be our northernmost member, in the UK at least!

What are services like in your area? You say they get carer support, but does your mum get respite? It's very important that she gets a break, it's very exhausting, caring 24/7.

If you are seriously worried about your memory-loss, please see a GP and ask to be tested. It's probably nothing more than stress, we all feel like that sometimes, and you have plenty of outside interests. Being able to play bridge would seem to indicate that your brain is functioning normally.

But please see your GP, he may be able to help with the depression.

Please post again, you'll soon make friends, and there is lots of support on offer.


Registered User
Jun 17, 2008
Thank you for your support


It's great to hear from others in similar circumstances. I work 4 hours twice a week for the local Citizens Advice Bureau and I find helping people with problems gives me buzz and takes my mind off my own problems with my father's dementia.



Account Closed
Nov 23, 2007
Hello Farnorth
There is a party going on tonight:)
Join "Fed up and sick of alzheimers" post:)
Barb XX
You just sounded like you needed cheering up:)