1. Lilyies

    Lilyies Registered User

    Jan 2, 2019
    13
    Hello everyone,
    I’ve been a member of TP for a number of months now and I have replied to a few posts but not introduced myself.

    I’m trying ,to deal with what life has thrown at us, my OH has been diagnosed with mixed dementia / Alzheimer’s some 18months ago and prescribed Risperidone which has worked wonders.

    However, it is now dawning on me just how totally consuming this terrible disease is. I so want to help and find answers as to how we can improve our day to day.

    reading TP helps me a lot and puts our situation into perspective . Yet Still I can’t help but feel completely mentally exhausted, so often I just want to drop my shoulders and exhale, breathe normally.

    When I wake in the mornings, I go into auto pilot, telling myself, today Will be a good day,
    we have a dog so there’s a reason to take a walk in the park and a coffee at the cafe. That is as good as it’s gets for us.

    Thank you all so much for just being there with honest, informative info , for caring and sharing your experiences at such a stressful time in your life’s.

    Lilyies X
     
  2. nellbelles

    nellbelles Volunteer Host

    Nov 6, 2008
    8,373
    leicester
    Hello @Lilyies welcome and I’m glad you have posted
    Yes it’s difficult but the support from the forum will be of assistance to you i’m Sure
    Walking the dog is always a good start to the day.
    Now you have found us I hope you will continue to post
     
  3. Loisand

    Loisand Registered User

    Dec 25, 2017
    128
    Hi Lilyies,
    TP is where i get all my help from, we are all in the same boat here, unfortunately not one dementia is the same as another, the disease is a very time consuming thing for a carer, I find it physically and mentally draining, what I would give to have a day where I wake up, make a cup of tea, take it back to bed and relax, that would be bliss, but you are amongst friends here, we may all be cyber friends, but there is always someone to advise, point in right direction or just have a good rant at. Welcome x
     
  4. Izzy

    Izzy Volunteer Moderator

    Aug 31, 2003
    59,436
    Female
    Dundee
    Hello @Lilyies and welcome to the forum.

    I’m sorry to read about your situation but I’m glad you’ve decided to post on DTP. I’m sure you will find lots of help and support here. Keep posting!
     
  5. Lilyies

    Lilyies Registered User

    Jan 2, 2019
    13
    Thank you for all your welcome’s , x
     
  6. Donkeyshere

    Donkeyshere Registered User

    May 25, 2016
    150
    channel islands
    Hi I have started to post on here alot more than when I registered 3 years ago, I have ranted, I have been angry, I have asked for advice, I've typed in between sniffing into soggy tissues, I've put completely boring stuff about teddies and lost teeth this week (don't ask!). But it does not matter whatever you put on, no one ever judges you, they always offer support or just have a chat about "normal" things. The support on here has given me the confidence to realise that you can adjust things, you cannot always understand other peoples reactions, but at the end of the day everyone is here for "you" no matter what. Good luck and keep posting - now where did I put those teeth....................
     
  7. marionq

    marionq Registered User

    Apr 24, 2013
    5,790
    Female
    Scotland
    @Lilyies i am guessing you are at an early stage on this journey and it will change so any good ideas you can put in place now will help later. I am thinking of all the basic stuff like POA for both you, separation of finances so that only your husbands assets will be assessed and yours protected, getting all your paperwork up to date over the coming weeks and months. Some women who left all this stuff to their husbands become overwhelmed so start now.

    On the positive side do all the walking you can and if possible in the company of other people. Try not to let yourself become isolated as a carer as laughing and chatting with others can preserve your sanity. So if there are any groups to join then do that. Look into daycare as a possibility to give you a break.
     
  8. Bunpoots

    Bunpoots Registered User

    Apr 1, 2016
    2,909
    Nottinghamshire
    Hello @Lilyies. You're in the right place for support. Keep breathing...

    @Donkeyshere your post made me smile. Have you found those teeth yet?
     
  9. jenniferjean

    jenniferjean Registered User

    Apr 2, 2016
    402
    Female
    Basingstoke, Hampshire
    Oh my word! When was the last time I was able to do that? I think you end up forgetting about that sort of life. Everything is now so orientated around the PWD. Your life completely changes and your own wants and needs just fit in where and when you can.
     
  10. Vic10

    Vic10 Registered User

    Feb 18, 2017
    57
    Hi and welcome.
    I love my dog walking too but OH no longer mobile enough to join me, so it’s now my precious half hour a day sometimes alone sometimes with a friend!
    I am learning all the time, as are we all, but my advise is that some things you just have to let go! We can’t do everything so don’t beat yourself up and exhaust yourself. Your health is important too! Look after yourself!
     
  11. Donkeyshere

    Donkeyshere Registered User

    May 25, 2016
    150
    channel islands

    Yep found the teeth under the bed - I passed them to the MIL but said she might want to give them a wash first - it was tad "dusty" under the bed!
     
  12. Bunpoots

    Bunpoots Registered User

    Apr 1, 2016
    2,909
    Nottinghamshire
    :confused::eek:
     

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