Hello all, if anyone remembers me i posted a little while back about our plans for moving my mother up to our cottage next to our house. I have not been around for a while as I lost my internet access when we moved back into the house folloing its renovations and have only this week sorted it out.
Anyway, We moved mam up here must be about 2,and a half months ago now and things are swinging from her being happy and appreciating that she could no longer live on her own, to having serious outbursts of screaming and shouting and hysterical crying.
She has been fixated on the ceiling in the cottage as she doesn't like it. OK no problem, we asked a builder to come see if anything could be done to change it, once that was sorted she now informs us she doesn't like the shower....She complained that her dogs could get out under our gates so we fenced her patio area off to keep them secure, now she's complaining they have no where to go.....Just 2 examples of a long list, but I'm sure you get the picture. Just when we sort one thing out, she moves the goal posts.
Our concerns about her living alone were confirmed when we began to go through her old house. It became obvious that she has not been managing for a very long time.
I stupidly thought before we moved her in, that we would be able to keep on top of things in the cottage when she moved up. How wrong I was. She wont let us do anything to help and the place is going down hill rapidly. I have no concerns for the cottage, but the though of her living like this is heart breaking.
Both the nurses and ourselves have concerns that she is not taking her medication properly, and they asked if I would have it and just give her it in daily amounts. We had the week from hell until we gave it back. They also suggested meals on wheels as she is not remembering to eat. They lasted 2 days before she cancelled it. She was coming over to the house for supper with us, which was better than nothing, but she now refuses to do this too.
But to top it all, she informed my sister this morning that she is moving out. Want's to be in a place with straight walls (We have stone walls in the cottage!).
I telephoned her nurse to see what support there is available if she does go and live alone again and was told meals on wheels, home care, someone to watch over her when she takes her tablets. But if she won't let them come in (No way on this earth is she going to let anyone do that) then there's nothing they can do full stop.
I feel such a failure. I dread to think what will happen to her on her own, but just don't know how to stop her. Not helped by her sister and brother both saying I can't let her go back on her own again. No pressure there then!
Sorry for the whinge, there's no point to this post really, but just needed to get it off my chest.
Anyway, We moved mam up here must be about 2,and a half months ago now and things are swinging from her being happy and appreciating that she could no longer live on her own, to having serious outbursts of screaming and shouting and hysterical crying.
She has been fixated on the ceiling in the cottage as she doesn't like it. OK no problem, we asked a builder to come see if anything could be done to change it, once that was sorted she now informs us she doesn't like the shower....She complained that her dogs could get out under our gates so we fenced her patio area off to keep them secure, now she's complaining they have no where to go.....Just 2 examples of a long list, but I'm sure you get the picture. Just when we sort one thing out, she moves the goal posts.
Our concerns about her living alone were confirmed when we began to go through her old house. It became obvious that she has not been managing for a very long time.
I stupidly thought before we moved her in, that we would be able to keep on top of things in the cottage when she moved up. How wrong I was. She wont let us do anything to help and the place is going down hill rapidly. I have no concerns for the cottage, but the though of her living like this is heart breaking.
Both the nurses and ourselves have concerns that she is not taking her medication properly, and they asked if I would have it and just give her it in daily amounts. We had the week from hell until we gave it back. They also suggested meals on wheels as she is not remembering to eat. They lasted 2 days before she cancelled it. She was coming over to the house for supper with us, which was better than nothing, but she now refuses to do this too.
But to top it all, she informed my sister this morning that she is moving out. Want's to be in a place with straight walls (We have stone walls in the cottage!).
I telephoned her nurse to see what support there is available if she does go and live alone again and was told meals on wheels, home care, someone to watch over her when she takes her tablets. But if she won't let them come in (No way on this earth is she going to let anyone do that) then there's nothing they can do full stop.
I feel such a failure. I dread to think what will happen to her on her own, but just don't know how to stop her. Not helped by her sister and brother both saying I can't let her go back on her own again. No pressure there then!
Sorry for the whinge, there's no point to this post really, but just needed to get it off my chest.