He is coming home!!!!!

Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by sammyb, Nov 7, 2007.

  1. sammyb

    sammyb Registered User

    Sep 19, 2007
    126
    Nottingham
    Thank you everybody for your advice, comments, best wishes and hugs last night. They meant such a lot to me. What a dreadful night!! Today I met with one of the nurses who was in the meeting yesterday and also to the doctor who was also in the same meeting. Basically there were 6 or 7 people in the room and all were asking my husband about the future and he couldn't answer apart from saying he'd be better on the scrap heap! He did say that he didn't want to come home but equally he said no to lots of other things too. Safest option I suppose. I think he felt well cornered but was apparently also flippant which was good to hear. That was a clear signal to me that he didn't appreciate the bombardment of questions as he saw it. I began to wonder just what meeting the SW had been in because others' interpretation of it wasn't half so bad. In fact the doctor said she could see his sense of humour coming through. So the hospital is looking to a week today for him coming home. God willing he does because, after yesterday, he has become beligerent again and has refused to eat and drink - except for me!

    Thank you so much everbody for your support last night. It was much needed. Bless you for being there.

    Love from Sammyb
     
  2. Skye

    Skye Registered User

    Aug 29, 2006
    17,000
    SW Scotland
    Dear Sammy, that's really good news. I hope it all goes well for you both.

    Love,
     
  3. Grannie G

    Grannie G Volunteer Moderator

    Apr 3, 2006
    69,561
    Kent
    I know it`s a cliche sammy, but what a rollercoaster you are on.
    Love xx
     
  4. TinaT

    TinaT Registered User

    Sep 27, 2006
    7,095
    Bolton
    Keep going Sammy. It is so hard for you. Has the social worker any idea what dementia is like? One minute my Ken is as happy as a lark, the next minute he is in the depth of despair! To give you an example. I arrived on the ward last week and he was in tears, banging his head and telling me he couldn't stay another minute, he was so unhappy being a prisoner when he had done nothing wrong. The food was bad here, the staff were funny, there was a man out to get him etc., etc., I called the nurse over so she could hear this and was very concerned about his state of mind. The nurse sat down, I asked him was he happy, had he any problems he wanted to tell the nurse just like he had told me. He replied he was happy and had no problems!!! We asked him three times - I was gobsmacked (as we say up north) and couldn't believe the turnaround within 30 seconds!!

    I feel so much for you and understand how devastating your husband telling people he wanted to stay in the hospital must have been for you. The questioning by the social worker - no matter how well meant- was to say the least unkind and unprofessional. What did she expect you to say in reply to such a question!! Whatever your answer you would have felt yourself to have been put in an indefensible position. A very poor, clumsy action on her part which may affect your future relationship with both her and your husband.! Keep up the good fight and so glad that you had a better day today

    xxx TinaT
     
  5. christine_batch

    christine_batch Registered User

    Jul 31, 2007
    3,388
    Buckinghamshire
    Your news has made my day

    Dear Sammy,
    You must be over the moon. I am so happy for you.
    S.W. are like a red flag to a ball with me. As for assessments - it is so confusing for our loved ones when they have a group of people asking questions and they wonder why A.D./ Dementia patients get confussed.
    No way would I let Peter go through one of those without me and I am talking from my personal experience.
    So now you can put all your plans into action. Probably spoil him rotten.
    You will have your loved one at home with you.
    Enjoy yourself. God Bless. Christine
     
  6. elaineo2

    elaineo2 Registered User

    Jul 6, 2007
    945
    leigh lancashire
    well done to you both.Don't let the heirarchy get you down.A positive attitude shines through with you,keep it up and all the love and luck in the world goes with you both.love elainex:)
     

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