Katrine and Cragmaid so perceptive and practical!
Somehow, Exhausted 2015, this 'position' is different, for me, from wiping his bum (done while singing a calming hymn to myself in my head) which was something I never thought I'd be able to do - but as Cragmaid said, done in a matter of fact way as if nothing at all out of the ordinary, and accepted by dad in the same manner, bless him for his kindness to me.
And Cragmaid is right - we each have to acknowledge what is our 'last straw' - your chosen TP name says a great deal in itself.
If it helps :- dad was peeing at night in all sorts of strange places and as I didn't live with him, I never quite knew what I was walking into each morning when I went to visit. (sorry - pun not deliberate - but won't edit it out). He is now in a care home - for another reason - and the staff say he has not left puddles at all; he has an ensuite so toilet is much closer. One less anxiety for him, I guess. I do feel that him being cared for by others has taken lots of pressure off us both.
I don't know what your overall situation is, but do think of accepting more help.