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Having financial LPA and paying myself expenses


Registered User
Mar 31, 2019
There's alot of background to this, such as my mum refusing to move near me, sister not helping etc. So this in itself is just a simple question ( which I know may not have a simple answer).
My mother doesn't live near me. I can do the journey in a day but add in driving her when I get there, it ends up about 7 hours driving each visit. I have a severe mental health illness myself plus some other physical problems.
My mum is getting worse now and always seems better when she sees me. I'd like to try and see her twice a week. The best and least time consuming way to do this is to stay in her town for 1 night.
However, I have tried staying with her overnight before and the constant demands, questions and never ending talking has made my bipolar worse and lack of sleep and stress has made my physical pains worse.
I have sole health and financial LPA and don't work but my husband does.
I would like to visit my mum one day, stay overnight but away from her to rally myself, and see her the following day. Airbnb for a room is between £50 and £60 a night.
Do you think it will be seen to be OK to pay myself from mum's money top up any travel and accommodation expenses that my carers allowance won't meet each week? My mum can afford it and if she wasn't super, super paranoid and anxious about money AND understood the importance to her welfare of my visiting and the importance of my welfare to have a break overnight she'd even offer to pay.
We have joint control of her bank account, although I have had to limit the amount she has access to for various reasons and she doesn't understand bank statements.
I already pay a neighbour of my mum a regular sum for expenses to take her to appointments etc.


Registered User
Jul 23, 2017
N Ireland
Hello @ScaredyCat

That's a very specific expense and the rather general content of the relevant Society Factsheet may be too vague, but here it is


Your attorney will be able to claim expenses from your money, but only for things they need to do to carry out their role as an attorney. For example, they can use your money to cover travel costs for going to the bank to discuss your accounts. They will not be able to claim an allowance from your money for the time they spend carrying out the role (unless they are a professional attorney such as a solicitor)."

I wonder if the experts on the support line have come across this before - it may be worth a try. Their details are
Dementia Connect support line
0333 150 3456


Volunteer Moderator
Dec 15, 2012
hi @ScaredyCat
as you are Attorney for your mum, you'd do best to check this with the OPG ... we can give opinions but the OPG are the ones who oversee LPAs

maybe put all the details in an email to them and ask for their advice


Registered User
Jun 12, 2020
I agree get the OPG to pronounce on this. I think you have a case, these expenses are for care not for your own benefit.