My mother has been in a temporary Care Home since last December awaiting sheltered housing. A flat has now come up in extra care sheltered housing where they have 24 hour carers available and we have accepted the flat. Notice has been given for her council flat and the tenancy agreement has been signed. I now have another worry that I have made the right decision about the extra care sheltered housing. My mother has told me that she wants more independence and would like her own flat again. But at the same time she likes it at the Care Home where they treat her very well (apart from laundry issues which are not that important in the scheme of things) The tenancy has started but mum has not moved in yet, I have been getting the flat ready for her. The other day when I was leaving the flat on my way out I met a resident who I have seen a couple of times there by the reception office. I asked her how she was and she said she was dirty. I asked her if she had told a carer. She asked me if I could help her get one. I rang the bell of reception and a carer came out and I said can you help this lady as she needs a carer. The carer told her in a very disrespectful and scolding voice ‘go back to your room’ I was shocked by her abrupt unkind manner and said don’t speak to her like that. The carer said to me you don’t know how many times we have to deal with this lady we have already seen her tonight. The resident screamed don’t be mean to me and I said to the carer don’t they train you to be kind to the residents in your care. She didn’t answer she looked like she was biting her lip wanting to put me and the resident in our place but thought better of it. Things fizzled out after that and I asked the lady for her room number and if she had any relatives who came to visit her and she told me that she didn’t. This has played on my mind ever since. I have reported it to the local age UK and they told me that this is the second report like this they have had and are going to address the matter. My mother was offered a place there once before but I turned it down one of the reasons being that I never saw any resident using the communal lounge and socialising is very important to my mother’s wellbeing. Hopefully this was a one off and usually they do show care to the residents. I hope. But what if I have got this wrong. I need to make decisions on my mother’s behalf and I am her only family member. She was looking forward to going to her new flat. We can’t predict the future we can only hope that we make the right decisions. I just needed to share this with someone as it has really been getting me down with worry. I know most if not all of you on this forum will understand that. Thank you for listening.