Have i completely lost the plot or is this unacceptable??

Discussion in 'I care for a person with dementia' started by henfenywfach, Jul 15, 2015.

  1. henfenywfach

    henfenywfach Registered User

    May 23, 2013
    Ok here goes!..have been my dads carer for few years. He has dlb.
    My mother who s been cared for by him for 30 yrs (not dementia related ) was asked by us to supervise the taking of medication after i found some lying around behind the sideboard or even still im the packet!

    Weeks later not only did she forget her own and twice ive found one left in hers...but last week i found 3 bp tablets pure white behind the sideboard!.. her comes the this is your last chance bit!..my mum in total denial insisted she supervises and hes fine with his tablets..

    My dad shakes thinks hes swallowed them and they fly accross room. Hence finding wet tablets. But pure white ones 3 of the same tabs same week. By this time im concerned..he has tias and the tablets are to ward off a stroke...

    My dad being anemic..had a never ending pot of iron tablets..and always seems to have them left.

    My mother doesnt seem to be aware of this. But if shes supervising him how come there are tablets left???

    Then we had few days and night time opened..on a monday morning. Monday am taken the rest just sitting there in reach of my dad.
    My mum said it was her fault false nails rushing etc. I then asked what his bloods were?? She didnt know..
    I knew that hed self medicated that morning. Clearly got confused and opened several boxes.

    Weve already had one overdose..and yes he is diabetic.!
    Last week was last chance...and have a guess what??..today i found aspirin behind the sideboard!!..
    Again no idea from both of them!!
    I dont expect him to comprehend but my mum???

    My dad said that he told my mum because he couldnt move it..but my mum had no recollection of it.

    Is it me or his he at risk of overdosing again..?? And having not had aspirin or bp for certain days at risk of stroke???..

    My sisters response just move the tablets where they cant fall down..

    The issue is not just the location of it..its the managing it.

    Would love to hear your views..ive emailed ss and memory clinic and will speak to gp !...

    I m sure you ll say that im not losing the plot..but this is just unacceptable isnt it???

    Sent from my GT-I9505 using Talking Point mobile app
  2. Kevinl

    Kevinl Registered User

    Aug 24, 2013
    Some of the meds you mention like the blood pressure, stroke and diabetes are really important, like life or death important. Is there anyone who can supervise the taking of the meds? The chemist should be able to give them in a dosette box so you don't have to remember what to take and went but is administering them and making sure they're taken is getting beyond your mums ability then you may need to involve a third party.
  3. Long-Suffering

    Long-Suffering Registered User

    Jul 6, 2015
    Hi H,

    Sorry to hear you sounding so troubled. You have every right to be worried, and as you say, it's not a question of the location of the meds but their management. It sounds like there is a real risk of your dad becoming ill due to either not taking important meds or overdosing. As it sounds like your mum is no longer capable of safely administering the meds herself, I agree with Kevin about a third party overseeing the administration of the drugs. Even the dosette boxes can be difficult for people to use if they have dementia, and they shouldn't be left within their reach. My dad had one, but he forgot what the purpose of it was and took a whole week's worth of steroids in one go. He almost had a heart attack and had to be admitted to hospital.

    Hopefully the people you've emailed will give you some help. It's better to be safe than sorry.

  4. canary

    canary Registered User

    Feb 25, 2014
    South coast
    #4 canary, Jul 16, 2015
    Last edited: Jul 16, 2015
    You could try the dosette boxes (blister packs) to start with. They have the day of the week and when they should be taken (morning, evening etc) so your mum should be able to see whether he has taken them or not. Perhaps she is in denial about the problem and doesnt want to "interfere". My husband is starting to get confused over his tablets too and he now has an alarm on his mobile to remind him to take the tablets. Could you organise something like that to rimind your mum to make sure he has taken the tablets? You can also buy dosette boxes that are alarmed to tell you that you need to take meds, but they have to be filled up, are fiddly and quite expensive.

    If that doesnt work, then I agree, he would need someone else (carer?) to come in and make sure he takes the tablets.
  5. JayGun

    JayGun Registered User

    Jun 24, 2013
    I would say that if your mum can't understand the problem then maybe she needs checking out dementia wise - but then I'd also have to say the same for your sister! :D ;)

    You're definitely not over-reacting. It sounds like your dad is on medication that needs to be taken regularly and at the right times. Maybe it's time to have carers coming in to supervise that as it's clearly beyond your mum now?

    I know that it's hard though, my daughter spent the day with her gran yesterday and failed to get her to take all her medication. (She has a morning pill, a pill she takes three times a day before she eats and a teatime and bedtime pill.) My mother in law is the very definition of non compliant though, and she doesn't understand the concept of taking a pill to prevent illness/pain rather than taking a paracetamol because you've got a headache.

    Is there any way to reorganise your dad's pill schedule so that he can take a few at a time or something? Any changes that would make it easier for him? Are there any that can be changed to patches etc?
  6. Miss shiraz

    Miss shiraz Registered User

    Dec 24, 2014
    MIL takes a similar selection of meds, she has dementia, we tried the dosette bkxes but days and dven time of day got muddled tablets missed, taken twice etc. She's diabetic and in the end the Doctor reluctantly agreed for daily visit by District Nurse. She supervises mil administering her insulin, mskes sure she takes her morning tablets and puts the other 2 doses in pots for later in day.., hit and miss if they're taken but are less important.
    we went through social services visiting and discussion about carers coming in but carers will not get involved in taking of drugs to the level of support that was required. The Doc then had to agree to DN, very reluctantly as its a drain on their resources!!
    its so hard to get support that you need and deserve. We can't all be there 24 x 7, but it seems expected a lot of the time.
  7. Lancashirelady

    Lancashirelady Registered User

    Oct 7, 2014
    I don't understand the problem with carers administering meds. Mum has a dosette box delivered every week, carers put it in the safe and give her the meds at each visit. It can seem a bit counterproductive when they give her metformin for her diabetes with a cream bun for tea but it keeps her happy and a lot healthier than when she forgot to take any table for days on end.
  8. Lindy50

    Lindy50 Registered User

    Dec 11, 2013
    I think maybe the reason for District Nurse involvement is the insulin injection? In our area, carers aren't allowed to be responsible for that. They can prompt / give anything that's in a dossett box, though, as long as it was filled by a health professional, and is recorded in a standard form. Any occasional things like antibiotics can also be given by carers, but they have to record this on a special medication record. Prescribed creams like barrier creams also have to be recorded on a separate form.


    Lindy xx

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