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Discussion in 'ARCHIVE FORUM: Support discussions' started by Margarita, Aug 17, 2007.
sounds good , but am wondering will it be at you house or his sons
Here. He's taken a couple of days off work to come.
I wonder if he'll volunteer agan?
you never know
it may work out , because john still in his own surrounding so will feel safe, John may give him changeling behavior , just don't take a mobile with you
Thank you to everyone for your words of support and understanding. I cannot bear to think of all this without you TPers in my court - so to speak!!
Dear Hazel, I do hope all goes well with your step son caring for his Dad. It will be interesting to hear his take on things when you get back. I hope you will share it with us.
In the meantime, do try and have a little bit of relaxing while you are away. I know you will be worrying about John but I'm sure his son will care for him - altho' not in the ways you do.
Thinking of you.
Thank you, Nell and Margarita. It wasn't really a holiday, I was in London for an AS meeting, but it was lovely to have a break. I was very worried about going, because John had the worst night ever on Sunday -- diarrhoea, refused to let me clean him, became physically aggressive for the first time ever.
I don't know if it was an infection, or the start of a new phase, but it shocked me because he has always been so gentle and co-operative.
Anyway, step-son assured me he'd cope, so off I went. (Yes, I took my mobile, couldn't bear to be out of touch).
In fact, it was a wonderful break. Connie and I shared a room, and we went to see Mamma Mia on Monday evening. It was perfect, completely took my mind off my problems.
Then on Tuesday I met some of the other moderators for the first time, and what lovely people they are. A pity they couldn't all be there, but we all have other responsibilities!
Step-son coped very well, even said he enjoyed it. They went through boxes of old family photographs together. And no more aggression (so far)!
It's the first time I've left John, and although he apparently kept asking for me, he doesn't seem to have suffered at all. I'm now seriously considering asking for respite.
I wish you everything you wish yourself as you re-consider respite. If John was unaffected by your absence, even though he was with his son, it must be well worth trying.
sounds like a really love time out , just what you both needed , I only say this hope it does not sound rude .
but when you say
like in any relationship , you can get on each other nerves when together for 24/7
so seeing that John got on well with his son while you was away , sounds like it done you both good, so pleased also that John could stay in his own surrounding .
Mama Mia - I have lovely recollections of this as we went in 2001 (I knew D was definitely suffering from Alz. although it had not been cofirmed) - it was one of the last trips the four of us had together (us and two daughters).
If you are serious about respite (and I hope you are) I was PMed some details about 'care at home'. It does sound good and although it is expensive its does compare with NH fees. Just a thought but you may have other alternatives.
I am so glad you had a good break and met Connie and others. Although we have not had the pleasure it does help us to feel included when you share that with us.
Take care Jan
I hope so, Jan. I'd hate there to be an 'us and them'. The people I met are exactly as I'd imagined them from their posts.
TP is definitely a wysiwyg forum!
Posted by Skye
Sat here trying to work out "wysiwyg". ............ah got it.
(What you see is what you get)
Becky: As a mod I had met some of the others twice before, so it was really lovely to spend some time with Hazel.
. My family at first said: "mum are you really going to London to spend the evening with a person you have never even met"? I did not feel that way, here on TP we are all one big family joined by similar problems.
As they say "It's good to talk "- boy, did we talk.
My family at first said: "mum are you really going to London to spend the evening with a person you have never even met"? I did not feel that way, here on TP we are all one big family joined by similar problems.
Yes - it sometimes amazes me that I don't actually KNOW you all - as in recognise you in the street to say "hello"!!!
My hubby said to me tonight "Are you going into your other reality tonight?" - and it must seem strange to our loved ones that we find such connection with our "cyber friends" - but there is no doubt that we do!! Amazing, but wonderful, I think!!
Hazel, I was thrilled to read your post!! SO very pleased everything turned out for the best all round!! Perhaps your step-son will "step up to the plate" a bit more, now that he has had this positive experience with his Dad??!! (Who knows?? )
wysiwyg....................Thank you Connie, I would never have worked it out in a million years.
I`m so pleased everything went well at the meeting. As you can imagine, Nell, Jan and Margarita, I was green with envy, being unable to go.
But it`s a bit of a `dammed if you do and dammed if you don`t `situation. If I had been able to go, Dhiren`s condition would have deteriorated to the stage where he would have accepted respite care.
wysiwyg... and don't forget reality - wysimolwyg
"what you see is more or less what you get"
this was in use some years ago in IT
Just wonder would you ever consider in the future , if they was every another meeting , do what hazel did , asking your son to stay with Dhiren at your home , while you went away for a few days.
Incontinent nurse rang the other day asking if I needed pads , so I ask her if they have any of those Tena pads that are like knicker , she said yes, was really surprised.
thought I 'll give them another go as Mel sent me a packet few mouths ago , mum keep pulling pad out , but thought I would give it another go while I wait for my order that I order on the net .
She leave them at desk at the heath center , seeing it not far away from me , I did not mind picking them up .
When I look at them , no wrong one , they wried . they look like a thongs straps , that you have to stick around them tena flex they called , mum could never pull them down as she still like to use toilet .
I did try strapping them around mum while she stood up , but it did not work , seem they are for if she was total incontinent , with no awareness
I give up