My mum hasn't been diagnosed as having Alzheimer's - or any other form of dementia - but appears to be suffering from some of the symptoms. She's 79 years old, fiercely independent and thinks her children are still children in as much as our opinions don't count (although we are both middle-aged professional people and I have six grandchildren). She's refused to been seen by a G.P. throughout her life - her last visit was in 2000 when my husband took her, when she was suffering from 'flu' and was delirious, so she couldn't argue with him. Mum still lives in her own home and won't consider having anyone help her, although she hasn't cleaned her home in years. When she broke both of her wrists earlier this year and had to live with me for a while, my sister and I had the house cleaned throughout: it's now back to the state it was previously in, with the kitchen worksurfaces covered in rotten and mouldy food and her table piled high with junk mail and newspapers, which she refuses to get rid of. Unfortunately, the main problem is that she eats so little that she now appears skeletal. Her only calories seem to come from the bottle (or two) of wine that she drinks each day. She suffers from cataracts, but has been told she can't have the operation to remove them until she has put on weight. I've tried to get her to take the types of soups used during convalescence, but although she says she's taking them, I know she isn't. She lives in the country, but drives into the nearby village each day. As she now no longer knows day from night,her neighbours have told me she has regularly driven to try to pick up her morning papers after midnight (and went to get her hair done somewhere between midnight and 7am this morning), she's probably well over the limit when she goes out. She seems to have a lot of minor accidents - which, she says, are always the other driver's fault. Although I felt awful doing it, I did report her to the Police, as if she ends up injuring someone I would feel guilty. The Police told me there's nothing they can do unless her G.P. says she shouldn't be driving. As she refuses to see him she will continue to be a danger on the roads. She also gets her money very muddled now (although she used to be an accountant)and ends up giving tradespeople far more money than they ask for, on occasion. There are also people who take advantage of her generosity - for instance she gave a trailer to someone who put in new windows for her. What I want to know is how to not interfere in my mum's life and independence, but to ensure that she remains safe and doesn't harm anyone else. If you have any ideas at all, please let me know.