Had enough today.

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jorgieporgie

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Mar 2, 2016
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Lavender at least your Mum is settling, the old Mum would have gone to the cinema and had her escape planned:D
Marnie if I lived closer I would do your laundry, its such a shame we all live all over the place because we certainly would have a good support team on hand.
Rosy forgot to say I am get excited now for this long awaited hol, count down as begun five more days and counting:cool::p
 

Lavender45

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Jun 7, 2015
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Evening all.

And she's off. She's been aggressive with her one to one. They called to let me know. They said she was agitated for around half an hour but had calmed now. Kind of glad they are seeing her behaviour from the start. She didn't hang about did she! With her hospital moves she was on "best behaviour" at least for a short time, clearly she's decided not to bother with that this time! X
 

MollyD

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Mar 27, 2016
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Oh, Lavender, the saga continues. Hopefully they are well geared for your mum's needs there. Keep sitting on those hands a while longer if you can, for your own sake as much as your mum's.

Marnie, no it isn't bad, you and your mum are in an extreme situation. It brings me back to mum at home. You are, as Aisling says, a human doing a super human job. Keep posting when you can. Sending you virtual support in whatever decisions you need to make.x

Amethyst, this thread was started by a very kind, open hearted person. Our dear Jorgie :). You are more than welcome here.

Also, thank you so, so much for your words of support. I'm coping on one level, can even resort to humour etc to help but I've never experienced anything as viscerally distressing, sad and difficult (if utlimately meaningful and love drenched) as this last couple of years. Your understanding about selling our family home being part of that helps validate all that. Sorry if that sounds silly. I hope you are ok. x

Hugs to everyone here in our TP family.x
 

WORRIER123

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Oct 1, 2015
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Mum is peeing for England and my bathroom is piled high with urine soaked bedding and clothing. I have ordered more pads/pants but it's the slowest delivery service going. I think she will have to have a catheter, we can't go on like this. Thank God for the live in, otherwise I would have probably curled up and died in the pile of pee soaked clothing by now!

I have chased district nurse. Just spoken to GP and someone should come tomorrow. Mum seems to be developing sores (urine to skin contact related?) and also has not done a no. 2 in a week and a half. GP has given me new dosage instructions for laxatives. I think once we get the urine under control, things will be a lot easier.

Anyone got a mobile laundry they can send in my direction?

SS have suggested mum needs double up carer visits, three times a day, and have also suggested an increase in care package. Someone due next week. So that's good news, amidst all the peeing issues.

OMG!

Bless you. Not been online much. It would have been my mums birthday yesterday and the next door neighbour constantly reminds me I have no family left.
I did the same as you. I don't know how I ended up doing it all but it happens
Seeing the hoist upset me dad looking helpless.
Luckily the pull ups he had were so good the bed stayed dry. I have 8 packs unopened (unisex) you are welcome too. They are Size large but no way dad was large.
Hope SS sort extra care out. They wouldn't let dad home without 2 Carer's 4 times a day
GP wouldn't put a plan in place for dad nor the district nurse. Only time they did was when the doctor at the hospital said he was in his later stages.
Hope u are ok and not wearing yourself out (says she who did the same )
Xx
 

Georgina63

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Aug 11, 2014
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Hello, everyone. When I comment here, I feel I am interrupting on a group of friends....I don't mean that as a moan, I am apologising! I read this thread and only comment if I feel I have something to say that might help. And for the lady who is selling the family home...we had to do that a few years ago. I was born in that house! It was just horrible emptying it all, in fact my sister just couldn't cope with it, and my eldest brother and I ended up doing it all. But here are the good things that came out of it...it really bought us closer together as siblings. No mum to make the phone calls and spread the news...but we all do it now. And for me, I look down the coast to where I was born, and in my head mum and dad are in their house. Whatever the time of day, I know their routine; and that is what they are doing. Some people might find that odd...but it comforts me and is not hurting anyone. I hope you find that comfort too, once the sale is over.
For the rest of you, everything sounds so hard and I truly hope you get the support you need.
And now I will join the background of 'lurkers' again!

Hi Amethyst, I've been a bit of a lurker of late too, so you are not alone! I'm also in the process of my folks' house sale and although it's not the house I grew up in, when it comes to it I feel very sad and emotional! (They are both in CH). I like how you can still picture them in their house, that sounds comforting. I hope I'll be able to do similar:). Georgina x
 

jorgieporgie

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Mar 2, 2016
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Morning Everyone,
Molly:)xx
Lavender that didn't take long, If you can wait until Monday I think it would be the best thing for your Mum, seeing you may ant her to come home again. It must be hard though not been able to go in and see what's what.
Marnie how was your night hope you got some rest.
How are you doing Worrier, your neighbour sounds a real pain in the butt tell her you have your TP family;)
It is pouring down here today, hope the sun gets out later.
Have a lovely day Ladies xxx
 

Georgina63

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Aug 11, 2014
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Today is the first time I've seriously considered a care home. It will need to be nursing care now. I have to admit that I'm thinking hard about this as this is going to be so hard now at home, unless I somehow adapt. Yesterday was non stop, I had no time for lunch and I have been up twice in the night washing and drying bedding!

The other part of me hopes this will be over soon. Mum is clearly into the realms of suffering and torment now with her condition. It's hard for me to watch and clearly hard for her to endure. Is it bad for me to wish for a swift and peaceful end, soonish?

Oh Marnie, no, not bad at all. Not even one tiny bit. None of us wants to see our parents or loved ones suffer - the prospect is just unbearable. Equally, please take care that your health doesn't suffer, which it sounds like you could if you push yourself to breaking point. Better to let others take the strain of caring for your Mum, so that you can be able to spend some decent time with her? So easy for me to say all of this whilst sat in my kitchen!! Some difficult decisions to make. I've been following your posts and know what an amazing job you've been doing, so be kind to yourself. Sending wishes your way. Gx
 

Georgina63

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Aug 11, 2014
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Oh, Lavender, the saga continues. Hopefully they are well geared for your mum's needs there. Keep sitting on those hands a while longer if you can, for your own sake as much as your mum's.

Marnie, no it isn't bad, you and your mum are in an extreme situation. It brings me back to mum at home. You are, as Aisling says, a human doing a super human job. Keep posting when you can. Sending you virtual support in whatever decisions you need to make.x

Amethyst, this thread was started by a very kind, open hearted person. Our dear Jorgie :). You are more than welcome here.

Also, thank you so, so much for your words of support. I'm coping on one level, can even resort to humour etc to help but I've never experienced anything as viscerally distressing, sad and difficult (if utlimately meaningful and love drenched) as this last couple of years. Your understanding about selling our family home being part of that helps validate all that. Sorry if that sounds silly. I hope you are ok. x

Hugs to everyone here in our TP family.x

Hi MollyD, just saying hello to you and all! Been lurking for a while and not getting around to posting, but glad to hear you are ok(ish?). Our house sale, after several stalls now happening. I can't say I like it much but I think it will be better once concluded! Take care, love Gx
 

MollyD

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Mar 27, 2016
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Ireland
Hi Georgina ☺. Lovely to hear from you. And thanks. I do hope it's better for you when it's concluded

Like amethyst said we can carry memories of our homes inside. The longer I'm here during this process, while hard and emotional I do feel I'm moving through something. It's not at a head level.

I feel for neighbours, particularly elderly neighbours, people who remember mum and dad living here. Most likely they'll witness the house getting a major overhaul. I prefer not to witness that.

On the upside, it'll be a home to a young family again, most likely.

How are your parents, G? X
 

MollyD

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Mar 27, 2016
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Hi Worrier, how are you?

Wishing everyone a manageable day. Marnie, rosy, Lavender, Polly, Dolly .... dealing wirh so much. And everyone, a group hug x
 

Pollytickle

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Nov 15, 2015
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Must be something in the wind, as Mum was taken in to hospital Friday afternoon. I couldn't fathom if her condition was due to a UTI, another TIA or the dreaded dementia, as the symptoms are all so very similar. I had been in to be with her all day but yesterday just felt awful myself, so taking another day 'off' today & back in tomorrow.
Pure coincidence that they have been giving her all sorts of laxative :p but there's no definitive diagnosis for her current state of being :eek:

I feel so guilty for not being with her but I don't want to pass any nasties on to the staff, let alone Mum or the other patients, so I'm going back to bed now & see if sleep will help battle the bug...I'm blathering...sorry *cough cough, sneeze, runs to the loo*
 

Georgina63

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Aug 11, 2014
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Hi Georgina ☺. Lovely to hear from you. And thanks. I do hope it's better for you when it's concluded

Like amethyst said we can carry memories of our homes inside. The longer I'm here during this process, while hard and emotional I do feel I'm moving through something. It's not at a head level.

I feel for neighbours, particularly elderly neighbours, people who remember mum and dad living here. Most likely they'll witness the house getting a major overhaul. I prefer not to witness that.

On the upside, it'll be a home to a young family again, most likely.

How are your parents, G? X

Folks are both fine at the moment, and faring much better now that they are in seperate buildings. It's taken a while (for me) to adjust to, but it has been a positive move for them both. Some days better than others. Dad on good form today and quite chatty, Mum asleep. Sometimes it's the other way around! Grateful for the period of relative calm. Gx
 

rosy18

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Jul 23, 2016
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Blackpool
Must be something in the wind, as Mum was taken in to hospital Friday afternoon. I couldn't fathom if her condition was due to a UTI, another TIA or the dreaded dementia, as the symptoms are all so very similar. I had been in to be with her all day but yesterday just felt awful myself, so taking another day 'off' today & back in tomorrow.
Pure coincidence that they have been giving her all sorts of laxative :p but there's no definitive diagnosis for her current state of being :eek:

I feel so guilty for not being with her but I don't want to pass any nasties on to the staff, let alone Mum or the other patients, so I'm going back to bed now & see if sleep will help battle the bug...I'm blathering...sorry *cough cough, sneeze, runs to the loo*

Aw Polytickle hope you're feeling better, what a dreadful time for you but you're right to stay away from hospital you don't want to pass anything else onto your poor Mum.
How is she feeling today, what are her symptoms.? It's awful when we are not too sure whether it is a uti, something else or this awful disease. I do hope she has improved today.
Take care of yourself PT sending a huge ((hug)) your way.xx
 

jorgieporgie

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Mar 2, 2016
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Oh Pollytickle sorry to hear about your Mum and you as well. Your best staying away from the hospital and take this time to get yourself better without having to worry about caring for your Mum too. Big hugs xx
Hope everyone else is ok x
 

MollyD

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Mar 27, 2016
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Ireland
Sending a hug, Georgina, I can only imagine how difficult it is visiting two parents. I do hope relative calm continues for you all. X

Polly, I'm sorry to read your mum is in hospital and that you're poorly too. Do take the time to rest and get well. Oh, it's just so hard on you. X
 

Pollytickle

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Nov 15, 2015
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If you don't mind, I'll accept the (((Hugs))) but only through the glass of a divers helmet so I can't pass on my bugs to you Lovely People :D They have worked because I feel well enough to see Mum tomorrow, so Thank You.

I'm waiting for the washing to finish then off to beddy-bys for me, late perhaps, but I've been napping all day :p

Sending decontaminated (((HUGS))) all around & under the circumstances, I won't be offended if you'd rather not take one :D
 

Marnie63

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Dec 26, 2015
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Sorry to hear your mum is in hospital PT, after 4 weeks of spending most of my days in a hospital with mum, I do sympathise. If you can, stay away for as much as you can, and have a break, but I couldn't!

It's now day 5 of mum being back home. We seem to have improved the incontinence situation. The issue was that the products we were using weren't 'industrial' enough for the flow, but I didn't have time to think or act to get some before mum came out. Supermarkets only stock a few packs, and never seem to have the larger sizes left. We now have more industrial pull ups, but need the nappy type ones as pull ups mean more rolling in bed for mum. They will, apparently arrive today, and yesterday I spoke to the continence service and they are sending some samples based on mum's new condition, so hopefully we'll have boxes of the things soon. Mum has no bladder control now, but even if she did, we can't get her to a toilet due to her having to be hoisted most of the time now. It's difficult.

On the plus side, yesterday was the first day I had no throbbing headache, and I have managed to wash all the smelly stuff, so the laundry is back under control.

District nurse came today - mum has a pressure sore on her heel and she also looked at a nasty pressure sore/wound which has developed in the bottom area. It's in a very tricky spot, so hope she can start to treat and heal it. She has left us with creams for both issues and is coming back on Monday. We haven't had a bowel movement for about 11 days now, and in spite of plentiful Movicol AND Lactulose, nothing is coming out. This immobility is starting to cause some serious problems.

This morning mum was very sleepy and it took a while for her to wake up, but she's brighter now and currently dozing in the wheelchair. The recliner, which I put on hold, is now being delivered next week. She sleeps a lot now, and sleeps through the night. In fact, if I didn't rouse her, I wonder if she would just sleep continually. We will try some standing exercises with her later on the rotunda, but she's so weak. I've decided her comfort and safety must come before my desire for her to stand/walk again, so will just take it as it comes. If she's sleepy, you can't force anything.

Just waiting for the care agency to let me know if they can provide someone to live in so that I can go on holiday end of October, otherwise another holiday gets cancelled. BUT, it's one thing having a live in carer when I'm here, but not sure about leaving someone in my house for a week when I'm away, with various other carers coming in to double up on the hoist and then to give her her daily break. But, I would like a holiday! I've told the agency I can be no 2 carer for the double ups for now, but they have to introduce two carers coming each time, that way my life may come back to some order. Still early days though. Maybe, in time, this will work. SS are due on Monday to reassess.

What a bloody nightmare.
 

jorgieporgie

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Mar 2, 2016
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The only positive thing I can say Marnie is at least your Mum is in her own home, well cared for and your don't have to go to the hospital for visits. Extra hugs sent to you xxx
Lavender how are things at your end, as your Mum settled x
Hope you all have a manageable weekend x
 

rosy18

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Jul 23, 2016
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Blackpool
Feel for you Marnie xx

Lavender I hope all is going ok with your Mum xx

Jorgie wishing you a fabulous well deserved holiday....Enjoy yourself

Mollyd thinking of you ((hugs))

Pollytickle hope you're feeling better and you have been able to go and see how your Mum is doing . I'm hoping she is feeling better.

Hoping everyone has a good a weekend as possible xx
 
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